It’s all down to this: the final event of the 2019 MarbleLympics. Will the Raspberry Racers hold onto the top spot? Will newcomers the Green Ducks steal it from them? Or will the Hazers achieve a shocking come-from-behind victory? It … Continue reading MarbleLympics 2019: Event #16 – Sand Rally + Closing Ceremony

After a string of speed-based events, it’s time for an all-out brawl. The marbles that once relied once relied on sheer velocity must now rely on strength and finesse. Adding to the chaos are four ball bearings whose launches can … Continue reading MarbleLympics 2019: Event #15 – Collision

The “surfing” event of the MarbleLympics is something like a biathlon, and in more ways than one: not only does the event involve two separate activities – a surfboard contest and an underwater race – but our athletes get two … Continue reading MarbleLympics 2019: Event #14 – Surfing

Much like NBC’s America-centric coverage of the HumanLympics, the MarbleLympics are not broadcast live. The videos are filmed, edited, and layered with inspirational music. But this means that an editing error can delay the official release of a video, as … Continue reading MarbleLympics 2019: Event #13 – Elimination Race

Equestrian events have long been a source of controversy in the HumanLympics: is it really fair to give medals to humans when the horses are doing most of the work? Our orbicular athletes don’t have time to ponder such philosophical … Continue reading MarbleLympics 2019: Event #12 – Rafting

Humans don’t like sand. It’s coarse and rough and irritating and it gets everywhere. Marbles, on the other hand, love sand. Their smooth surfaces make it hard for grains to stick to them, so they can glide across the dunes … Continue reading MarbleLympics 2019: Event #11 – Dirt Race

(Apologies for the abbreviated writeup. Typing on a laptop on a hotel bed isn’t exactly conducive to penning good prose.) This is it: the twisty, shifty, mindbending marble maze (brought to you by Hubelino!) There is no strategy here. No … Continue reading MarbleLympics 2019: Event #10 – Hubelino Maze

We’re back with more exciting MarbleLympics coverage! This time, the marbles are facing hurdles. No, don’t worry, they don’t have to jump or anything; they just have to push a series pendulums out of the way. These are metaphorical “hurdles” … Continue reading MarbleLympics 2019: Event #9 – Hurdles Race

Moving to the outdoors is a tricky proposition. There’s no way to account for all of Mother Nature’s vicissitudes, and physical conditions can radically change in the span of minutes. In the past, lesser sporting events, such as the Summer … Continue reading MarbleLympics 2019: Event #8 – Summer Biathlon (Triathlon)

We’ve had tests of speed. We’ve had tests of agility. We’ve had tests of endurance. Now finally, it’s time for a test of raw strength. Block pushing is back, baby! This event dispenses with the usual tournament format and instead … Continue reading MarbleLympics 2019: Event #7 – Block Pushing

The Relay Run isn’t just a test of speed; it’s also a test of finesse. Having clean, quick handoffs is just as important as attaining high velocity. In fact, sometimes attaining too high a velocity can cause the next marble … Continue reading MarbleLympics 2019: Event #6 – Relay Run

Competition is heating up at the 2019 MarbleLympics, and it’s time for a classic: it’s Usain Bolt’s favourite event – the 5 meter sprint! This appears to be the simplest event of the tournament, but looks can be deceiving. There’s … Continue reading MarbleLympics 2019: Event #5 – 5 Meter Sprint

My apologies for getting this up a day late. Our marbles have no time to waste in this event, yet another race. But this time around, there’s a twist: it’s a team race! Teamwork is required to get three of … Continue reading MarbleLympics 2019: Event #4 – Gravitrax Slalom

Historically, balancing has been one of the less interesting events of the MarbleLympics. The whole point of the exercise is, well, not to fall off. The stakes aren’t particularly high; falling a few centimetres isn’t going to damage a marble. … Continue reading MarbleLympics 2019: Event #3 – Balancing

“Funnel Race” is more than a bit of a misnomer. The point of the event is to finish last, which if anything makes it the exact opposite of a race. But semantics don’t lessen the excitement of what is one … Continue reading MarbleLympics 2019: Event #2 – Funnel Race

Hello folks, and welcome to the start of what might become regular coverage of the Marblelympics at The Avocado, depending on reader interest. We begin with the opening ceremonies, a relatively sedate stop-motion affair compared to what’s about to follow. … Continue reading Marblelympics 2019: Event #1 – Underwater Race