Werewolf 128: Extreme House Hunter-Uppers Brothers

Piper and Craig Lastname are a young family on the grow. He owns a pharmacy while she sells plants on the side. Their life should be perfect… except for one thing!

[cymbals, pan to a couple bumping into each other in their kitchen]

Their home. They’ve decided they’ve just had enough of their current house!

I love it, but it’s just not enough anymore.”

[shots of unreasonably narrow hallway, normal amount of clutter, Piper struggling to do laundry]

With two kids already and a third on the way, the Lastnames are in need of a forever home.

Our budget is eight and a half million dollars.” 


Hello everyone, so glad you could make it on such short notice. We talked through e-mail? Yes, I’m Spooky H. Friend, but you can call me Spooky since we’re so close.

You’re all here to participate in what we’re calling the “Battle Royale” of HGTV. That’s right: You’ll all be fighting to prove yourselves the best interior designers America has to offer. Whether your expertise lies in utilizing space to the fullest potential, using color to change the entire feel of a room, or blunt force weapons, you’ll have to use every advantage you have to fight to the top!

And, uh, I’m not fully sure how to describe game mechanics through the lens of this RealEstateAgent!Spooky I’ve made up, so I’m just going to do that out of character. Sorry about your immersion.

This game’s kind of experimental, so I’ll split up this part into two sections: Classic Werewolf Rules and Special HGTVwolf Rules. They both apply at all times, but it’s easier to process this way.

Oh, also, speaking of experimental rules: Yeah, I know this game seems like a lot. I know. It’ll be fun. Don’t be mean to me.

Classic Werewolf Rules

The game is for 24 players, but if anyone beyond 24 signs up I’ll add them– the nature of this game is extremely volatile and I’d like as many people to experience it as possible. The SPICY 27 PLAYER UPDATED ROLES include:

  • 22 Interior Designers (Town)
    • 15 Vanilla Designers
    • 1 Chip from Fixer Upper (Jailer, can’t jail self or same person twice in a row)
    • 2 Property Brothers (Masons, both die if one is killed)
    • 1 Erin from Hometown (Vigilante, two shots)
    • 1 Mina from Good Bones (Alignment Investigator)
    • 1 David from Love It or List It (Role Investigator)
    • 1 David from Lottery Dream Home (Can decide what room to vote on in the next day thread)
  • 6 Mishaps (Wolves)
    • 2 Load-Bearing Walls (Vanilla)
    • 1 Permit-Related Issue (Can investigate one player’s taste in decor)
    • 1 Flip or Flop divorce (Roleblocker)
    • 1 HGTV Dream Home (Hidden Wolf, reads as town to investigator)

The Serial Killer (Capitalism) role may be activated at some point in the game through a player’s actions in the day thread. The activation event could be caused by anything, but I won’t be telling you what it is if it happens. If the serial killer is activated, the role will be assigned through RNG between everyone.

The Alignment Investigator gets a result of scum/town, while the Role Investigator gets a result of vanilla/roled. Vanilla wolves read as vanilla.

Ties will be broken through RNG between everyone except those involved in the tie. Yes, you read that correctly.

Try to make at least three game-related posts in a day. Do not edit posts, unless you’ve accidentally doxxed yourself and want to remove personally identifying information.

Please keep GIFs and jokes out of the vote thread.

Be kind.

(Also, the rest of the usual rules.)

Special HGTVwolf Rules

The secondary goal of this game, besides winning the game for your faction, is to design the Lastname family’s dream home. Each game day will feature one room of the house, such as the kitchen or master bedroom. There will be a House Vote Thread alongside the usual Vote Thread. In this House Vote Thread, everyone will be able to vote on one of six (or so) appliances or design elements to add to the room. The top three will be put into the house.

Each player has a taste in decor that will be assigned to them via QT. This might include rustic, modern, coastal, traditional, etc. Each design element in the House Vote Thread might correspond to your taste in decor. If any of the three design elements that win at twilight align with your taste, you’ll receive a prize in your QT. These will vary wildly in both helpfulness and quality.

At the end of the game, we should (ideally) have a lovely home to sell to the Lastname family, along with a winning faction! 🙂

i promise this game will be fun. please sign up. keep an open mind. things are going to be a little bonkers.

Players (as many as want to join!):

  1. DW
  2. Anna
  3. Captain Video
  4. Owen
  5. Sic Humor
  6. Lindsay
  7. Emmelemm
  8. MacCrocodile
  9. Raven and Rose
  10. Lamb Dance
  11. Nate
  12. Sister Jude
  13. Gramps
  14. Side Character
  15. CuteAndCurious
  16. Miss Rim
  17. Jake
  18. Hayes
  19. Wasp
  20. Hoho
  21. Ralph
  22. Malthusc
  23. April
  24. Nuka
  25. Louie
  26. Hicks
  27. RPC