Friday, June 2nd, 1978
MARCIE KLEIN: Hey, everyone? Did any of you happen to notice that astral portal behind the stalagmite is still there?
JANET WEISS: Is … is it safe to go through? I really don’t want to be stuck in this rocky, horrific cave anymore.
(Gena the Crocodile walks over and tosses an onion into the portal, where it vanishes.)
GENA: Is safe.
IRV: How the hell can you know that?
SCORPION: I will find you, Sub-Zero!! (Scorpion leaps into the portal.)
(The others stand around for a moment, exchanging awkward glances.)
GENA (nods): Is safe.
(The crocodile walks through the portal. The others follow. Lawrence Welk is the last to go through.)
LAWRENCE WELK: Stay happy and keep a song in your heart!
(The gods and monsters step out of the portal to find themselves in a planar dimension of perfect beauty and grace. A mountain larger than the planet they just escaped rises from an infinite ocean of holy water. The silver and blue sky bathes the celestial plane in gentle shades of luminance.
Zaphael and Ralgath stand nearby, they appear to be having an argument that is interrupted by the group’s arrival. The angel takes a deep breath and approaches, the demon casually following behind.)
ZAPHAEL: What are you doing here? I believe I gave you all clear instructions that you were to remain in the cavern until Ralgath and I returned.
DAVID BOWIE: Actually, no, mate, you didn’t. All you said was that you would return soon.
RALGATH: He’s right, Z.
(The angel shoots an angry glare at the demon, who returns a wry smile.)
GRAYSON: Where are we?
ZAPHAEL: The Seven Mounting Heavens of Celestia. All souls who dwell here are beautiful and perfect. Except yours, of course.
KING RALPH: Hey! (farts)
ZAPHAEL: Gathering all of you together in one place was clearly a mistake. We thought we would be able to detect the S.C.U.M. amongst you.
RALGATH: YOU thought that. I thought it was a fucking awful idea.
ZAPHAEL: Nevertheless. For the sake of preserving humanity’s existence, we cannot allow you to return the Material Plane until we resolve this situation.
(Ralgath whispers an incantation, and the astral portal leading back to Walla Walla vanishes.)
ZAPHAEL: Don’t think of it as exile, think of it as … actually I can’t come up with anything other than exile. Sorry. Now, as you arrived, Ralgath and I were discussing a suitable course of action. I must see to some celestial matters. I shall leave Ralgath behind to ensure you all behave appropriately. No. Murdering. Understood?
(Golden, feathered wings sprout from the angel’s back and he flies up into the perfect sky.)
|Bahamut (Jake, T.O.W.W.N.)||Cookie Monster|
|Erinyes||Elvira (Spiny, S.C.U.M.)|
|Gozer||Invisible Man (Wasp, T.O.W.W.N.)|
|R’hllor||Sulley (Donalbain, T.O.W.W.N.)|
11 Totally Ordinary Walla Walla Natives (T.O.W.W.N.): The T.O.W.W.N. faction want to maintain the status quo, with gods and monsters living alongside mortals. They win the game when the S.C.U.M. faction has been eliminated.
4 Secret Cabal for Undoing Mortality (S.C.U.M.): The S.C.U.M. faction believes the creation of mortals was a grave error, and seek to eradicate humanity from all realms of existence. They win the game when the number of S.C.U.M. players equals the number of T.O.W.W.N. players.
1 Independent: Does not belong to T.O.W.W.N. or S.C.U.M. They have their own secret agenda and win condition.
–No quoting or screencapping from QTs. Do not ask other players about their QTs in an attempt to figure out what role they have.
-You cannot edit any of your posts.
-Votes for NPCs (like Madge) will not be counted.
-The S.C.U.M. faction has a collective role-blocking power.
-If a day’s voting ends in a tie,
one player has the power to break all voting ties one of the tied players will be chosen by random dice roll and killed.
April // Greg, who is not an alien
Clodia // Marcie Klein
Corporal Hicks // Lawrence Welk
Donalbain // Mightily Oats SULLEY, T.O.W.W.N.
DW // Scorpion
Glitch // Irv
Grumproro // Janet Weiss
Hayes Code // Seven Japanese Tourists
Hohopossum // Old Bones
Jake // Billi Roman BAHAMUT, T.O.W.W.N.
Lamb Dance // Clock Man
Lindsay // Grayson Wolfsbane
Louie Blue // David Bowie
MacCrocodile // Gena Crocodile
Mayelbridwen // George Washington Masonic National Memorial
Ralph // King Ralph
Sic Humor // J.K. Rowling
Sister Jude // Bee Arthur
Spiny Creature // Tilda Swinton ELVIRA, S.C.U.M.
Wasp // Donkey Kong INVISIBLE MAN, T.O.W.W.N.
Mr. I’m My Own Grandfather
Day Three ends on Tuesday, April 23 at 10:00AM PST (1:00PM EST), or if a majority vote is reached first.