I posted these rewatches on the old site, and am now reposting them here. The night is dark and full of spoilers

Episode title: Breaker of Chains

Director: Alex Graves

Written by: David Benioff & D.B. Weiss

Summary: Dontos and Sansa flee the feast. Shortly afterward, Cersei and Tywin order the city gates barred and all ships seized while they search the capitol for Sansa. Dontos and Sansa flee using a small rowboat, and soon arrive at a larger ship hiding in fog. Having Sansa climb the ladder first, she is met on the large ship by Littlefinger, who pays Dontos for his services by having him killed.

Olenna and Margaery discuss Joffrey’s murder, and how, as their marriage was unconsummated, she is not the Queen. In the Sept, Tywin speaks to Tommen about becoming the King, and the qualities that a King must possess. The two carry on their conversation and depart the Sept, leaving Cersei to grieve Joffrey. Jaime arrives soon after and consoles Cersei, who asks him to kill Tyrion before a trial can take place. Jaime refuses and forces himself on Cersei, raping her on the floor next to Joffrey’s remains.

While engaging in a bisexual orgy, Prince Oberyn and Ellaria Sand are interrupted by Tywin, who requests to speak with Oberyn privately. Tywin believes that Oberyn may have had a hand in Joffrey’s murder, but Oberyn refutes the claims. Oberyn responds by directly accusing Tywin of ordering Gregor Clegane (“The Mountain”) of raping and murdering his sister, Elia. Tywin denies the accusations, but offers to have the Mountain speak with Oberyn about her murder, in exchange for Oberyn serving as one of the three judges in Tyrion’s trial.

In his cell, Tyrion is visited by his squire, Podrick, who brings him some supplies. Podrick tells Tyrion he is to be tried in a fortnight, and that Sansa has not been seen since the wedding. Before leaving, Podrick tells Tyrion that he was approached and asked to testify against him in exchange for a knighthood. Tyrion orders him to bring Jaime and then flee the city, as he fears for Podrick’s life.

Sam speaks with Gilly about moving her to Mole’s Town to keep her safe, as many of the Night’s Watch brothers were arrested for rape. Gilly wants to stay at Castle Black, but is taken to Mole’s Town where Sam finds her temporary lodging.

The wildling party led by Tormund Giantsbane executes a raid on a small village, and Styr forces a small boy to run to Castle Black, to tell the Night’s Watch what they have done. At a large gathering, Ser Alliser tells the men that their duty is to protect the Wall first and foremost, which is echoed by Maester Aemon. When Alliser asks Jon, he reluctantly agrees that they must prioritize the Wall, before he is interrupted by a horn blast indicating returning rangers. Edd and Grenn return through the passage and tell their brothers that Karl and his band of mutineers are living in Craster’s Keep. Jon remembers his lie to Mance Rayder about having 1,000 men guarding the Wall, and says they must ride north and kill the mutineers before Mance finds out the truth about the Night’s Watch forces.

Stannis has Davos read a letter sent to Dragonstone, informing them that Joffrey is dead. Stannis claims it is the result of leeching Gendry’s blood and burning the leeches. He chastises Davos for releasing Gendry, and for not having managed to raise an army for their cause. Davos then visits Shireen, who continues to teach him to read. Speaking to her about Braavos, he comes to a sudden realization and has her write a message to the Iron Bank in Stannis’s name.

Sandor Clegane and Arya Stark continue their journey east toward the Vale of Arryn, before accepting an offer of shelter from a farmer. At dinner, the Hound agrees to work for the farmer in exchange for some silver, but in the morning, he steals the farmer’s silver despite Arya’s protests.

Daenerys and her army arrive outside Meereen, where they are received by the Champion of Meereen. Ser Jorah informs her that she must send her own champion to battle the one from Meereen. Her advisors argue over the chance to fight for her, but Daario Naharis is selected. As the Champion of Meereen rides toward him, Daario throws a dagger into one of the horse’s eyes. The horse falls, and he easily kills the champion. Daenerys then speaks to the city’s slaves, telling them of her victories in Astapor and Yunkai, and having freed those cities’ slaves. She then orders her catapults to fire, and they launch barrels filled with broken slave collars into the city as a sign of the freedom she intends to bring them.

My take: I’m not even going to start about Jamie raping Cersei. Talk amongst yourselves. So clearly, someone is a fan of Monty Python. In addition to the pronunciation of Knights by Davos, the champion of Meeren is clearly the French taunter. What makes a good king? Why listening to Tywin, of course! Was there any doubt the Hound was going to rip off the farmer, even after he said that he was not a thief? I wonder if the Iron Bank is going to be suspicious when Stannis’s letter has all the “I’s” dotted with little hearts. Daario’s handling of the Meeren champion is brilliant. And tossing the collars over the wall is brilliant as well. Why risk your own men when you can the slaves do the work for you?

Changes from the books: The sex between Jamie and Cersei was consensual in the books. Following his arrest Tyrion is not sent to the black cells but rather confined to quarters. Davos never writes to the Iron Bank requesting financial aid, nor does he suggest hiring the Golden Company. Rather, Tycho Nestoris comes to treaty with Stannis after Cersei refused to honor the debt the Crown owed to the Bank. The conversation between Olenna and Margaery does not occur in the books. It is not clear what Margarey knows about the assassination. In the books, Oznak zo Pahl faces off against Strong Belwas, who hasn’t been introduced in the show canon so far. After three successful charges, Belwas injures Oznak’s mount and forces him to meet him on the ground. Belwas allows him to cut him before he decapitates the champion, and then defecates next to his corpse. The TV series changed this to urinating in the general direction of Meereen’s slave-masters. Daenerys doesn’t order the chains and collars of freed slaves to be fired over the walls of Meereen in barrels.

Nudity: Olyvar and three whores in an orgy

Locations on the Map: King’s Landing, Dragonstone, the Dreadfort, Winterfell, the Wall, Meeren

Death Count: Dontos, killed by Littlefinger’s men. Ollie’ parents, killed by Ygritte and Thenn, as well as their village.

Quotes Shireen Baratheon: You won’t be a very good Hand if you see the word “knight” and say “ka-niggit.”

 

 

Episode title: Oathkeeper

Director: Michelle MacLaren

Written by: Bryan Cogman

Summary: Ser Jaime Lannister continues his sword training with Bronn, who urges him to visit his brother, Tyrion. In the dungeon, Jaime and Tyrion discuss Joffrey’s murder. Tyrion claims he had no role in the murder, but knows that nothing will change his situation, as Cersei will not rest until he is dead. Jaime tells Tyrion that Cersei has offered a knighthood to whomever captures Sansa, but Tyrion is also confident in her innocence.

In the gardens, Lady Olenna tells Margaery that she will soon depart for Highgarden. Olenna encourages Margaery to bond with Tommen before Cersei can turn him against her, and assures Margaery that, while straightening her necklace, she never would have allowed her to marry cruel Joffrey. Margaery visits Tommen in his chamber to discuss their impending marriage, and begins to form a relationship with him, per her grandmother’s advice. In the morning, Jaime gives his Valyrian steel sword to Brienne, along with new armor, and charges her with finding and protecting Sansa. He also has her, though reluctantly, take on Podrick Payne as a squire in order to prevent him from becoming involved in Tyrion’s trial and to keep him safe. When she is ready to depart, she names the sword “Oathkeeper”, which Jaime approves of.

Sansa is informed by Littlefinger that they are bound for the Vale of Arryn, as he will soon marry her aunt, Lysa. He points out to Sansa that a stone was missing from the necklace Dontos gave to her, and she deduces that the stone was likely the poison used in the murder. Littlefinger claims that by having no motive to kill Joffrey, he will not be suspected of the crime. He also claims that his new allies can offer him more than the Lannisters would.

Janos Slynt tells Thorne that it may be wise to send Jon on an expedition to Craster’s Keep, as he earlier requested, so the mutineers can kill him and prevent him from being elected as the new Lord Commander of the Night’s Watch. Thorne tells Jon that he will allow him to lead a group to Craster’s Keep, and Jon rallies several of his brothers to his cause, including Grenn, Edd, and Locke.

Grey Worm leads a group of Unsullied into Meereen through the sewers, where they come upon a large group of slaves discussing Daenerys and her army. The Unsullied group arms the slaves with swords, and through the night, the slaves kill their masters and free themselves. In the morning, Daenerys orders the remaining masters executed, having them nailed to posts as they had slave children killed to mark each mile to Meereen.

At Craster’s Keep, one of Craster’s former wives enters the Keep and presents Karl with Craster’s last child, a son. The women call for it to be given to the gods, and Rast takes the child out into the forest, leaving it behind. On the way back, he taunts Ghost, Jon Snow’s direwolf, who the mutineers have caged. Nearby, Bran and his companions hear the infant’s cries, and he uses his warg abilities to send Summer in search of the baby. As Summer, Bran sees Ghost caged, but before he can help, the wolf falls into a trap and Bran awakens in his own body. The group spies on Craster’s Keep, but before they can try to free Summer, they are captured by the mutineers. Bran, Jojen, and Meera are taken to Karl, who forces Bran to admit his true identity.

Meanwhile, deep in the Lands of Always Winter, a White Walker is seen riding a dead horse and carrying Craster’s last son. It places the baby on a small altar of ice; after a moment, another White Walker picks up the child and touches its face, causing its eyes to turn blue.

My take: Belle calls what Ser Pounce did as “beaver damming” (a variation of cock blocking). Any guesses as to what’s in Tommen’s spank bank now? The royal scepter has been raised. I think it is interesting that Tyrion asks Jamie to smuggle him out, since that is exactly what happens later. I also like it that Oleanna pretty much comes out and tells Margarey that she killed Joffrey. Locke talks about not sucking up to “high-born cunts” and we’re going to hear more of that coming up, especially next season. Belle was wondering what happens to the babies after they are touched. Do they have White Walker Day Care? Nannies? Bring your baby to slaughter day? And other questions: Do we think Jamie’s page is going to be filled in by Brienne? Can Karl be any more loathsome? Is Rast Karl’s bitch?

Changes from the books: Ser Pounce was actually one of three black kittens which Margaery Tyrell gave as gifts to Tommen. When Brienne sets out from King’s Landing to look for Sansa, Podrick does not accompany her. Much later, following Tyrion’s disappearance after killing his father, Brienne notices Podrick following her. He explains that he also wishes to find Sansa, as Tyrion may be with her, and because Sansa can prove her husband’s innocence, so Brienne agrees to let him travel with her. Sam never revealed to Jon that Bran was beyond the Wall. Vargo Hoat (Locke’s analogous book character) was never at Castle Black. Bran’s group never come across Craster’s Keep in the books, and thus aren’t captured. Neither Ghost nor Summer are caught and imprisoned by the Night’s Watch mutineers. The scene that Craster’s last son is brought to the Lands of Always Winter and turned into a White Walker is not present in any of published books. In the books, Sansa does notice that one gem is missing from the hair net. She has no idea who removed it until Littlefinger reminds her. The conversation between Margaery and Tommen does not occur in the books.

Nudity: Craster’s wives/daughters getting raped

Locations on the Map: King’s Landing, Dragonstone, the Dreadfort, Winterfell, the Wall, Meeren

Death Count: In addition to the men killed in the uprising, Dany crucifies 163 men

Quotes: Bronn: Nah… he hated the little twat, sure. Who didn’t?

Karl: Fuck ’em ’till they’re dead.