Jerry agrees to look after a stranger’s dog for the night, only for it to turn into a week. Jerry, George, and Elaine all try to watch a movie together, revealing that George and Elaine can only talk alone if they make fun of Jerry the whole time. Kramer tries to break up with his girlfriend.

Written by: Larry David
Directed by: Tom Cherones

This is another unpopular episode – not as disliked as “The Deal”, but definitely brought up almost as often. I also don’t remember liking it that much; even by the standards of Larry David (and even by the standards of someone who likes dogs), the idea of being too embarrassed to turn down taking care of a complete stranger’s dog is a foreign and uncomfortable one to me. Gavin is a pretty great Seinfeld Weirdo – the confluence between his alcoholism, Britishness, stuttering, bravado, and utter conviction that Jerry loves his dog as much as him are the blending of details for a two-scene character that you only really find on this show. Presumably, this comes from the story being taken from Larry David’s actual life.

Luckily, there’s a lot more to the episode than Farfel. I love the notion of ‘friends in law’ that the episode explores, where you make a friend through another friend and are forced to be nice just because you both care about the same person. I’ve always been a fan of the way The Simpsons presents boredom, finding the most elaborate and sophisticated way to convey a boring situation; this goes the other way, being oppressively realistic in the way George and Elaine struggle to hold a conversation, and in the middle of the show’s usual flow it comes off really funny.

(The fact that George and Elaine bond best over mocking Jerry feels almost obvious for this show)

The best part of all, though – and something I think people frequently forget is in this episode because I forgot it was – is Kramer’s turbulent relationship with Ellen. This contains his iconic argument to the camera in which he switches from dismissing her very existence (“YOU CONTRIBUTE NOTHING TO SOCIETY!”) to begging her to take him back. Kramer’s fundamental joke is that he does everything wrong – up to and including never feeling shame – and still somehow succeeds, so watching him navigate the banalities of a relationship is fundamentally funny, especially his genuine shock that Jerry and Elaine would lie to him about his girlfriend to make him happy.

TOPICS O’ THE WEEK

• The barking is provided by Tom Williams, which only makes it more uncanny and uncomfortable.
• I was once at the courthouse to lend my girlfriend money for the bus home (she was emotionally supporting a troubled friend), and ended up roped into walking a disabled man’s dog while he was waiting for a ticket. It felt like an incredibly Seinfeld story to go through – for one thing, the leash was too short and I was hunched over the whole time – and shows how stories can influence the way we see ourselves.
• “We can switch apartments for the night!” / “No!” – This is a great moment of Seinfeld’s smug acting helping the scene.
• Jerry’s disgust with people picking up dog poop is the ultimate form of his crude childlike view of the world, as is the fact that he is apparently unaware of the concept of dog kennels.
• George and Elaine talking about Jerry vomiting flatly contradicts a later plot about his vomit streak. I will take this in stride as the reality of television circa 1991 rather than try and rationalise an explanation.
• Prognosis: Negative is the first big fake pop culture for the show, and it’s amazing how I feel like I know how the movie goes despite not one word of the script describing the plot.

Biggest Laugh:

Next Week: “The Library”.