Towards the end of the Age of Strife, the Emperor crafted 20 magical clone babies that he called Primarchs. The forces of Chaos didn’t like the Emperor very much, so they kidnapped his magical clone babies and threw them randomly all over the galaxy, and the Emperor had all kinds of adventures finding them again. This thread is about the third magical clone baby the Emperor recovered – [Redacted], Primarch of the 2nd Legion.

As you may be wondering, the Emperor got REALLY mad at this Magical Clone Baby and demanded that all data pertaining to this Primarch be expunged from Imperial records. As such, we don’t know much about him. We know that he was found in 29,851 AD and that by 29,994 AD the Emperor had declared him to be Damnatio Memoriae. All else is speculation.

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I believe that this magical clone baby landed on the planet Tleilax, sole planet in the Thalim system. They were discovered by one of the last Tlielaxu Masters, and were modified and raised to be a Tlielaxu Face Dancer. They were named Tobias Darkhölme by this old Master.

The Emperor found Tobias, and sent them out to conquer in his name. Unfortunately, Tobias’ skillset often resulted in planets that had been incorporated into the forming Imperium of Man didn’t even know that they’d been conquered. This put Tobias on thin ice with their Dad, and when Tobias asked why there weren’t any lady magical clone babies or space marine legionnaires, the Emperor flipped his shit and said “NO SON OF MINE THINKS ABOUT GIRLS!”

Feeling some family bonds, despite his bigotry, the Emperor did not kill his non-binary child, but just kicked them out and took away their legions. This would, as would many many other decisions, come back to haunt the Emperor. But that’s a story for a different Day Thread.

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Don’t be like the Emperor, my friends. Be accepting of the wonderful rainbow of differences on the Avocado, and don’t be a dick.