You are now entering Ad Space, a realm of commercials, brought before us so we might examine how they work, and discuss why we both love and hate them so. So it is written …

The Product:
Regal Furniture

The Promotions:

The Pitch:
We’re a shabby, poorly run business on the verge of being shut down … but we’re cheap!

I’m so used to ads trying to make what they’re selling look more glamorous, more alluring, and more … better, that these came like a shock to the system.

They’ve clearly decided that their target audiences isn’t people looking for the best furniture or a polished presentation. Their peeps just want the best deal they can get, and are willing to let things like appearances or fire safety fall to the wayside.

Rather than puffing itself up, Regal Furniture outright tells people their store is dilapidated. They admit they’re losing the lease on their warehouse. They describe their own merchandise as “ugly” and “scratched and dented”. They even go so far as to (in jest … I hope) say that all the unsellable furniture stuffed in their attic is a massive fire code violation, and they’re desperate to unload it all before the Fire Marshall does an inspection.

Hopefully, Regal Furniture is a privately owned company, because they’d be in deep doo-doo if stockholders ever caught some of these ads. But for advertising to customers … they’re quite clever. There are absolutely people who don’t give a crap about grungy appearances or poor business practices, so long as it can save them a few bucks. If it seems like the business is being run into the ground, and they can take advantage of their desperation to avoid bankruptcy, all the better.

The message of these ads is, if you ever wished it was feasible to buy your furniture out of a sketchy van in a Wal-Mart parking lot … well, Regal Furniture is the next best thing.