We’re afraid we at Ralphroro Enterprises must once again start the day by addressing a malfunction with The Werewolf-O-Matic, and by asking everyone to please check your QTs.
Look, the good news is that our technicians have fixed the system error that assigned additional investigator roles.
The bad news, however, is that one of them spilled some Monster Energy Drink on the jailer role-distribution mechanism, causing The Werewolf-O-Matic to randomly assign additional jailer roles across all players and Ralphroro Enterprises Associates. Once again, these system error jailers will be able to attempt to jail someone after twilight, but with only a 50% success rate. This is another unfortunate black eye for our organization (which, we need not remind you, was nominated for two J.D. Power Awards in reliability). Our technicians (except for the one who was fired for spilling the Monster Energy Drink) are working diligently–and under great scrutiny–to remedy this regrettable incident.
Our Ralphroro Enterprise Associates have made their choice and inserted their punch cards into The Werewolf-O-Matic’s patented Punch Card Reception slot. Tell us whose free trial ends now, Werewolf-O-Matic!
Okay, that’s supposed to say Troy McClure (Cop), Vanilla Town. But I think we can all agree it’s still quite impressive how close The Werewolf-O-Matic came to spelling those words correctly! It looks as though Mr. McClure’s free trial has come to an end. We may remember him from such Werewolf games as the one we’re currently playing!
And, what’s this? It seems someone with some inside knowledge of our fine product has hacked into The Werewolf-O-Matic’s mainframe to wreak havoc on the game and produce another night kill!
Grung (April), a Vanilla Wolf, is no longer part of this game. He can resume his duties at the Ralphroro Enterprises gravel mines. The man knows his rocks! Thank you so much for your efforts, Mr. Grung!
So, with that, Day 2 of your trial of The Werewolf-O-Matic is underway!
13 11 Vanilla Town (So normal!)
1 Jailer (Very normal jailer stuff. Can’t jail themselves.)
1 Medic (Perfectly normal medic. Can heal one player each night.)
1 Investigator (You know what an investigator does. Normal investigator stuff!)
1 Ralphroro Regional Manager (Roleblocker Wolf)
1 Ralphroro District Manager (Investigator Wolf)
2 1 Ralphroro Entry-level Associates (Vanilla Wolves)
1 Disgruntled Ralphroro IT Specialist (Doesn’t answer your emails–so cannot be investigated–and is also the serial killer!)
?? System Error Jailers (Could be anyone. Once again, we apologize for these unforeseen roles. 60% accuracy rate.)
Normal Werewolf rules! When there are as many or fewer members of a faction remaining, the other faction wins!
Ties will be resolved using the Werewolf-O-Matic patented tie-breaking formula: (y + x) + ab = k
- y = total number of letters in both/all tied players’ names.
- x = total number of votes for both/all tied players
- a = game day (i.e. “Day 1” = 1; “Day 2” = 2, etc.)
- b = total number of remaining scum
- k = the number of player posts, after the vote thread, when sorted by oldest. The player who posted that post will be killed.
Simple yet effective!
Please note that you will need to make a handful of game-related comments per Day (three to six at least). The Werewolf-O-Matic runs on participation (and plutonium). Failure to participate may lead to your trial being transferred to another person.
NO EDITING OR DELETING for any reason, including typos.
Directly quoting or screenshotting QT is not allowed.
Remember to have fun! This is a game of murder, but it is still just a game.
A final word of caution: This program may be considered a risk. An experiment. Ralphroro Enterprises is not responsible for any disasters that may occur in this game due to “imbalances” or “technical difficulties”. Ralphroro Enterprises reserves the right to make any changes that will result in a more enjoyable game at any time. By signing up for this game you are acknowledging that you have read and understood this word of caution and forfeit your right to pursue legal action against Ralphroro Enterprises. Ralphroro Enterprises hopes that you enjoy this game, and that you embrace it for what it is.
Hello! Thanks for accessing your free trial of The Werewolf-O-Matic! You are Vanilla Town. As this is a totally normal game of Werewolf, your only power is your vote, which you can cast and change at any time during the day.
If you have any questions about the Werewolf-O-Matic or your trial game, please don’t hesitate to contact our J.D. Power Award-nominated Help Desk, who are patiently standing by right here in your QT.
We’re sure you’re going to love your trial of the Werewolf-O-Matic, and we know that you’ll want to register your trial for the low price of $89.99 per month. But go ahead and enjoy your utterly normal trial game of Werewolf!
- Marlowe (Hank Hill)
April (Grung)Vanilla Wolf
- hoho (hoho Snakeytail)
Cop (Troy McClure)Vanilla Town
- Jude (Mae West)
- Owen (William Carlos Williams)
- Lindsay (Vincent Adultman)
Kim (Zim)Vanilla Town
- Mac (Mac, from the Temp Agency)
- Dramus (Dramus, Serious Werewolf Player)
- Goat (Beauregoat, the Janitor)
- raven (Jane, the Intern)
- Nate (The Law Firm of Dewey, Cheetham & Howe)
- Thoughts (Frustrated Parent)
- Lamb (Oscar Martinez)
- Jake (Wonder Woman)
- Tiff (Tess McGill)
- Beelzebot (WAP (but not that WAP))
- Stoneheart (Bibidoof)
- Warrior (Electrified Warrior Machine)
- Canadave (Eric, the New Employee)
You have until Thursday, 11:00 AM Central to decide who to eliminate.