Werewolf 153: Ralphroro Enterprises Presents The Werewolf-O-Matic! – Day One

We at Ralphroro Enterprises must apologize. While we always give 110 percent to ensure top-of-the-line Werewolfing experiences, not all of our products meet our exacting standards. In this case, the Werewolf-O-Matic seems to have produced a few extra “Investigator” roles and distributed them randomly among all players and Ralphroro Enterprises Associates. Our technicians assure us that there is one actual town Investigator among this cohort of players, but we are unable, at this time, to determine who it is. Moreover, our technicians have informed us that any investigations conducted by the faulty “Investigators” will be only 60% accurate. 

Needless to say, this is not how we envisioned our product launch going. All of our products go through multiple quality control checks before they are delivered to customers. However, this one regrettably slipped past those checks and failed to live up to our standards. We deeply regret this malfunction, and we want to assure you that we are working around the clock to address it in a timely fashion.

Once the system is running as expected, we’re sure you’ll agree that The Werewolf-O-Matic is the pinnacle of Werewolf game design and implementation, and we at Ralphroro Enterprises know that once you experience the utter normalcy of a Werewolf-O-Matic Werewolf game, you’ll never look back!



13 Vanilla Town (So normal!)

1 Jailer (Very normal jailer stuff. Can’t jail themselves.)

1 Medic (Perfectly normal medic. Can heal one player each night.)

1 Investigator (You know what an investigator does. Normal investigator stuff!)


1 Ralphroro Regional Manager (Roleblocker Wolf)

1 Ralphroro District Manager (Investigator Wolf)

2 Ralphroro Entry-level Associates (Vanilla Wolves)


1 Disgruntled Ralphroro IT Specialist (Doesn’t answer your emails–so cannot be investigated–and is also the serial killer!)


?? System Error Investigators (Could be anyone. Once again, we apologize for these unforeseen roles. 60% accuracy rate.)


Normal Werewolf rules! When there are as many or fewer members of a faction remaining, the other faction wins!

Ties will be resolved using the Werewolf-O-Matic patented tie-breaking formula: (y + x) + ab = k

  • y = total number of letters in both/all tied players’ names.
  • x = total number of votes for both/all tied players
  • a = game day (i.e. “Day 1” = 1; “Day 2” = 2, etc.)
  • b = total number of remaining scum
  • k = the number of player posts, after the vote thread, when sorted by oldest. The player who posted that post will be killed.

Simple yet effective!

Please note that you will need to make a handful of game-related comments per Day (three to six at least). The Werewolf-O-Matic runs on participation (and plutonium). Failure to participate may lead to your trial being transferred to another person.

NO EDITING OR DELETING for any reason, including typos.

Directly quoting or screenshotting QT is not allowed.

Remember to have fun! This is a game of murder, but it is still just a game.

A final word of caution: This program may be considered a risk. An experiment. Ralphroro Enterprises is not responsible for any disasters that may occur in this game due to “imbalances” or “technical difficulties”. Ralphroro Enterprises reserves the right to make any changes that will result in a more enjoyable game at any time. By signing up for this game you are acknowledging that you have read and understood this word of caution and forfeit your right to pursue legal action against Ralphroro Enterprises. Ralphroro Enterprises hopes that you enjoy this game, and that you embrace it for what it is. 

VT Message

Hello! Thanks for accessing your free trial of The Werewolf-O-Matic! You are Vanilla Town. As this is a totally normal game of Werewolf, your only power is your vote, which you can cast and change at any time during the day.

If you have any questions about the Werewolf-O-Matic or your trial game, please don’t hesitate to contact our J.D. Power Award-nominated Help Desk, who are patiently standing by right here in your QT.

We’re sure you’re going to love your trial of the Werewolf-O-Matic, and we know that you’ll want to register your trial for the low price of $89.99 per month. But go ahead and enjoy your utterly normal trial game of Werewolf!



  1. Marlowe (Hank Hill)
  2. April (Grung)
  3. hoho (hoho Snakeytail)
  4. Cop (Troy McClure)
  5. Jude (Mae West)
  6. Owen (William Carlos Williams)
  7. Lindsay (Vincent Adultman)
  8. Kim (Zim)
  9. Mac (Mac, from the Temp Agency)
  10. Dramus (Dramus, Serious Werewolf Player)
  11. Goat (Beauregoat, the Janitor)
  12. raven (Jane, the Intern)
  13. Nate (The Law Firm of Dewey, Cheetham & Howe)
  14. Thoughts (Frustrated Parent)
  15. Lamb (Oscar Martinez)
  16. Jake (Wonder Woman)
  17. Tiff (Tess McGill)
  18. Beelzebot (WAP (but not that WAP))
  19. Stoneheart (Bibidoof)
  20. Warrior (Electrified Warrior Machine)
  21. Canadave (Eric, the New Employee)


  1. Indy
  2. Narrow

You have until Tuesday, 1:00 PM Central to decide who to eliminate.