Dating, Relationships, and Sex: Contraception (02/24/2021)

I recently read a column from a woman who’d gotten a hormonal IUD, and who ended up having an absolutely terrible time for several months. Neither her having complications with the IUD nor her doctor refusing to remove it for several months were inherently surprising to me, albeit of course very depressing. But at least as enlightening as the article itself was the comment section. The phrase “it was the most painful thing I’ve ever experienced” (in relation to having an IUD implanted) kept reoccurring to a rather frightening degree.

Besides serving as a stark reminder of just how much crap people with a uterus put up with not to get pregnant while leading an active sex life with possessors of an erectile organ, it was kinda funny to think about just how little I as a cis dude have actually been confronted with contraception in my life, and as far as I can tell, many/most of my peers. Of course I can (and have) read up on the topic in my own time, both in terms of biology and technology, but if it weren’t for that, there would be roughly three things I’d know (or would think I know) about the topic:

  • Periods are a thing and somehow related to pregnancies. They can be unpleasant and somehow it’s about blood.
  • Rubbers exist and they go over my thing.
  • If I want a permanent solution, I can get a vasectomy.

That’s it. That is the extent of the information society would have heaped upon me about contraception without me going looking for it myself. Which seems kinda depressing?

Anyway, I’m rambling. Point is:

  • What’s your contraception of choice, and why? Multiple answers can apply, of course.
  • What have your experiences been in general?
  • Anecdotes about partners and their attitudes/knowledge (or lack thereof) on the topic?
  • What do you think everybody should know about contraception and/or the underlying biology, but maybe does not?
  • Etc.

As always, anything related to dating, relationships, intimacy and so on is fair game and welcome.

And of course, as usual: This is supposed to be a space to talk about intimacy and sex and relationships in safety, so don’t shame people for their kinks. But please also refrain from objectification and similarly problematic behavior. People are supposed to feel safe and comfortable here.

Have fun!