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The Thursday Politics Thread Cares More About Ukraine Than Biden

It was actually the other way around in the hearing

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about how the Politics Thread

Morning Politocadoes!

Testimonies in the Impeachment of Donald J. Trump (take it in folks, isn’t it lovely to say?) began on Wednesday, with US Diplomat Bill Taylor and Deputy Secretary of State George Kent. The open, televised hearing started out as we all thought it might: with the Democrats, led by Adam Schiff, seriously and thoughtfully laying out the justification for this impeachment and the Republicans, well….giphy (1).gif

After Chairman Schiff delivered his opening statement, Ranking Member Devin Nunes, the man who is suing a cow on Twitter, started things off on the proper note by accusing the impeachment hearing of being a ‘televised, theatrical performance’, writing off the distinguished witnesses as stooges of the Democrats. He spouted off some unhinged conspiracy theories, among them that Ukraine helped Hillary in the 2016 Election so that later, after she lost she could then smear Trump and pin it on Russia question mark?  The whole thing was fairly embarrassing.

Let’s roll some of that beautiful bean footage!

Jim Jordan’s turn to question the witnesses turned into a loud, angry screed. The congressman attempted to cast doubt on Ambassador Taylor’s account because of the clarification Gordon Sondland had made in his testimony.  Jordan’s attempts proved to be in vain as Taylor calmly explained his nonpartisan role in the matter as a witness and that Sondland’s clarifications seemed to corroborate his views on the matter.

It’s not really that important, though. Jim was palying for an audience of one, making sure the President had lots of small bite-size clips of people angrily attacking his foes and defending him from all inquiries.

I could go on, but the hearing yielded some important new information. Namely, Bill Taylor became alarmed about the military aid being withheld after Vice President Pence had his meeting with President Zelensky in Warsaw. This was when Sondland told Ukraine that the aid was being withheld pending an announcement of investigations by Zelensky. Trump was also implicated directly as he was overheard by someone on Taylor’s staff on a phone call with Gordon Sondland, asking about “the investigations” and being told that the “Ukrainians are ready to move forward.”

Now, hey, c’mon, let’s give Trump the benefit of the doubt. I mean, it’s not like he has an incredibly distinctive sort of loud braying that anyone plugged might recognize. It’s not like a phone call between a President and an Ambassador (and not even the ambassador to the country that the call took place in) would get noticed. It’s just so unlikely!

Keep those belts buckled, kids, it’s gonna get so much worse and so, so much dumber.

Welcome to Thursday! Please be excellent to each other! The Mayor McSquirrel Rule is in effect because we’re better than him. If you notice a news item being posted too often, alert a mod so it can be pinned to the top of the thread.