Dynamite was a children’s magazine published by Scholastic from 1974 to 1992. Notable for being founded by Jenette Kahn, the president of DC Comics for 25 years, the magazine was edited by Jane Stine, wife of R.L, and also contributed to by the future R.L. Stine, who wrote scary stories under the name “Jovial Bob”. The magazine included celebrity interviews, puzzles, games, magic tricks, comics, and other fun features.

This is the second magazine that I’ve done featuring Christopher Reeve as Superman. He was a big deal in the 70s!

Something lost with the decline of print magazines is the discussions that get sparked in reader mail sections. It’s like a months-long public argument conveyed with smoke signals over distant hills, presented hands-off by the editors to let people just react how they want and bounce off each other.

I love some snarky editorial staff credits. How do you think the Count Morbida’s Castle address worked? I’m assuming it was a partnership between an office suite in a well known building and close communication with the Post Office. Also note the list of “contributors and distractions”. Jane Stine and R.L. Stine have been married for fifty years now, and I bet they are an absolute hoot together.

I’m begging someone, anyone, to pick up that top image from the sidebar and adopt it as their avatar.

So I had to learn what Ice Castles was for this feature, and after a blessed trip to Prime Video I came away with knowledge of what has to be The Greatest Gift To Twelve Year Old Girls In Cinematic History. Cute boys! Figure skating! Torch songs! Cute hockey boys! Tragic accidents! Blindness but in a glamorous way! Roses! Hardass Colleen Dewhurst! Hot 80s daddy Tom Skeritt! Boys! It has everything!

Oh and Superman was also a thing, I GUESS.

I didn’t know that David Prowse trained Christopher Reeve for Superman! Neato.

Oh Chris…I wouldn’t be so confident about that typecasting thing.

”Skating was fun, but you can’t spend your life having nothing but fun. At 10, Lynn-Holly picked out her career.” JESUS.

Many former figure skaters do in fact see more ice in a whiskey on the rocks than they do in a rink, but Lynn-Holly seems to have made it out alright.

Be the most popular kid on the playground by trying to pass off these jokes as your own!

Ah, the Exploratorium! Site of so many childhood field trips. And later grownup field trips for team building, where I watched many work acquaintances get absolutely wasted at the special event bar. Not something we would have predicted back in third grade. Most science museums lack in opportunities to get day drunk. This is from the period when the museum was housed in the Palace of Fine Arts, since it did not move to its current location until 2013.

They had the phosphorus shadow-camera thing well into the 90s, from what I remember.

The light-tree exhibit seems pretty sweet.

The artist for this series was Chic Stone, who had a long career with both Marvel and DC comics.

Ventriloquist dummies seems to be the secret theme of this issue. Good luck sleeping!

It’s a real travesty that these guys never showed up on Legion.

Yeah I have a better idea let’s just walk away from this creepy ventriloquist dummy shit and never speak of it again.

These are all bizarre and very 1970s and wonderful.

I looked into these artists and the only one who is still active on the art scene seems to be Philip Slagter, who continues to make some beautifully vivid surreal paintings. The other artist I could find any information on was Paul Krosnick…who was arrested for possession of child pornography in 2011 while working as an art teacher at an elementary school. Daaamn.

I love the weird drippyness of this illustration style.

DEAR DYNAMITE, I TRIED OUT YOUR SECRET MESSAGE RUBBER BAND TRICK ON MY FRIEND JIMMY. I WROTE “U R SO CUTE” ON THE BAND AND FLICKED IT AT HIM IN FRENCH CLASS BUT IT HIT HIM IN THE EYE AND HE MIGHT LOSE HIS SIGHT IN THAT EYE PERMANENTLY. AT LEAST HE CAN’T LOOK AT OTHER GIRLS NOW HA HA HA.

Gotta love that pop-art header.

What was on TV at 11:30 pm that a 10 year old would care about in 1979? Saturday Night Live?

The existence of streaming and DVR pretty much kills the funny of this strip and almost turns it into a political cartoon in today’s world.

We really don’t make enough of that whole “vampires obsessed with math and puzzles” thing anymore, do we. Like, Edward Cullen needs to be on the math team if he really wants to get the most of his vampire potential. All vampires do these days is mope! Did they run out of Sudoku puzzles?

Dear Lucky Winner,
Hi. How are you? I’ve been thinking of you a lot lately and I’ve been having nightmares as a result. Thanks for your recent letter. It was the perfect size for the trash can. I would have written sooner, but I forgot your name. I’ve been quite busy these days, carving a replica of Mt. Rushmore out of Jello. I’m doing some neat things with my family. For instance, I’m putting my father in the freezer so I can have an ice cold pop. I’ve got some exciting travel plans. I’m going on an ice skating tour of the Bermuda Triangle. Lately I’ve been thinking about a career. My future looks bright because I’ve been staring into the sun for the last two days. You might not recognize me since we last got together. That’s because I’ve grown a second head. That’s enough about me. Are you still in jail? You must write again. Next time, may I suggest you enclose a dollar if you want me to read the letter.
Bye for now,
Your old pal,
Malcolm

Dear Ms. Malcolm,
We have reviewed your application and cover letter for the position of University Library Dean and have ultimately determined that you do not qualify at this time. Thank you for your interest and we wish you the best in your future endeavors.

Now having seen Ice Castles, I get who Robby Benson is, and wow – that is one beautiful human. I have no idea what the disco gang or the delta house kids is, but I think I might have heard of STAR WARS II.

Scholastic also published kids magazines called Wow, Hot Dog!, Bananas, and Peanut Butter. Clearly they had a winning formula. Contrast this format with the Junior Scholastic magazine we looked at from the 50s – all I can say is, thank goodness for acid.

Does Bananas come with a fold-out poster of Alan Alda? SIGN ME UP!

Please send Erin Walton a birthday card and tell her that she should stop being such a whiny dumbass all the time.

(I have watched more of The Waltons than probably anyone else of my age, and I am not proud of it)

What is with the ventriloquist puppet madness!! IS DYNAMITE BEING CONTROLLED BY AN EVIL VENTRILOQUIST DUMMY? THIS LOOKS LIKE A JOB FOR THE DYNAMITE DUO!

 

Thanks for reading! Next time we’ll be looking at Yahoo! Internet Life from February 2001!