The Ben Quadinaros Night Thread (5/24)

Ben Quadinaros is most famous for coming in last place at the Boonta Eve Classic.

*cue failhorns*

Wookiepedia identifies him as a rookie. He is also a Toong from the mysterious planet of Tund. I assume that’s a planet where the denizens have anatomy that makes zero sense. I mean… given a mouth as big as Quadinaros’, the body provides precious little room for a digestive track. Not to mention how a Toong’s mouth is located in a spot uncomfortably close to his anus.

 

 

Look, an elephant creature totally cuts the cheese in front of all the pod racers. Poop exists in Star Wars.

Quadinaros’ racer seems to have strung together four Pratt & Whitney turbofan engines. A quad engine configuration, if you will. Had he gotten it to work, he likely would have overtaken Anakin who had a measly two engines.

Then again, Quadinaros might not be built for racing. Unlike Sebulba whose naturally horizontal Dug frame leads to a low and evenly distributable center of gravity, Quadinaros is built to be top heavy. Even if he got his podracer’s power couplings operating successfully, he would still be prone to tipping over badly when rounding the sharp canyon corners on Tatooine.

Despite all this, Wookiepedia also tells me that Quadinaros apparently improved to the point where his rivalry with established champ Sebulba was legendary. He never appeared on the show. However, he did show up on the poster in the room of noted pod racing champion and aficionado Anakin Skywalker, which showed that Quadinaros had become a main eventer.

Good on ya, Ben! You’ve made Toongs all over the universe proud! I imagine Obi-Wan Kenobi’s alias while in hiding was a winking tribute to your prowess.  (And if this is true, that means Kylo Ren’a birth name is “Boonta Eve Classic last placer no family by myself.”)