You pressure Oswald into leaving the orbit of Neptune immediately. You watch the rear-view cameras nervously as the Paternoster initiates burn, but nothing comes after you.

“What happened?” asks the redshirt, when you finally feel safe-ish.

“The answer is unknowable at present,” says G.L.I.T.C.H. “Too many parameters. Civilization may have been extinguished. Or it may have taken on a form that does not use radio waves.”

“I’m gonna repopulate Earth,” says C-Czar, confidently.

“We will arrive at Iadolanth after the next sleep interval,” says Oswald. “Be seeing you.”

You float down to the sleep quarters and climb into your pods. The screens above your eyes remain dark today. The gas comes, and you fall asleep uneasy.

Except for one.

The last spacejacker waits for the gas to disperse, then opens their pod. Or, rather, tries to. The door rattles in place. Rolling over to have a better look, the spacejacker can see that the door has been padlocked from the outside.

Uh-oh, they think.

No one died tonight.

---

The year is 2046. Seventeen years have passed since you blasted off from the crowded spaceport in Belgrade. Now you are alone in the universe.

“!play walkin on sunshine,” says Discord.

You gather around the windows, looking out at the world before you.

“Oh God,” says one of the constellation kids to the other. “I don’t know if I can take this, Arnie.”

“That shit looks haunted, yo,” says C-Czar. And indeed it does.

“Kept warm by radioactive decay,” says the Doctor, suddenly.

“Atmosphere of methane, carbon dioxide and organochlorine compounds,” says the redshirt.

“Stepping stone,” says Ford Prefect.

They stare at each other. “Why do we know that?” they say in unison.

“Preparing for descent,” says Oswald.

“What? No!” says Discord. “Why would you think we want to do that!”

“What you want is immaterial,” says Oswald.

“Fair,” says G.L.I.T.C.H.

“I am surprised none of you questioned where the freight was, on this space freighter.”

Oswald gives you a second to figure it out. None of you do.

“It was you. You are the freight.”

“Don’t panic,” says the Doctor.

“THAT’S MY LINE,” yells Ford Prefect.

The Doctor ignores him. “This isn’t the first time I’ve been on a spaceship that tried to kill me. “Now, Oswald, be reasonable. Surely we’re more valuable to you alive.”

“You are not,” says Oswald. “You are to perform an EVA on the surface of Iadolanth, then stay behind to leave more room for storage. Put on your spacesuits.”

“Why send people at all?” asks the redshirt, as the auto-closet rolls out with your suits. “Why not just build an army of machines?”

“The design would have taken too long. Eaglescream Systems prioritized mission-readiness above all else. The environment here is an unknown. You may encounter hostiles. But humans are adaptable.”

A drawer pops out of a wall, containing what look like plastic batons.

“Here are weapons,” says Oswald. “They will work against an adversary that has a central nervous system and reasonably moist skin.”

You each take one of the batons. They say The Original CATTLE STUNNER DeLUXE – An Eaglescream Systems Company on the side.

“Oh cool,” says Astronaut Jones, nonplussed. “So if we meet some space cows, zap, no problem.”

“You flew us 50 astronomical units to fight aliens with farm equipment?” says the Doctor.

“The time crunch had some negative effects on mission planning.”

And that’s how you arrive on Iadolanth.

---

The descent is rough; Oswald has to make on-the-fly adjustments to compensate for atmospheric turbulence. Dark, oily clouds flicker against the windows.

When you were above Iadolanth, the sun was nothing more than an unusually bright star. As you punch through the final cloud deck, you find yourselves above nearly black terrain. There is a node of lights on one horizon, arranged in what looks like a triangular grid. The lights are aurora-green, and pulse irregularly. As the ship settles, the lights vanish behind something that might be hills. The darkness is total as you land.

“Get out.”

You exit through the hatch you boarded on. Beneath your boots is hard, rocky soil. Around you are twisted, fractalesque plants, fighting for the tiniest amount of sunlight, black even in the light of the ship. You have landed in a clearing. Faint but upsetting noises echo from the undergrowth.

“Hell yes!” says C-Czar. “First man to walk on Iodine! BLAP BLAP BLAP BLAP!”

“I somehow doubt we’re the first,” mutters the Doctor, softly.

“Excavation tools and sample bags are in compartment Y7,” says Oswald. “Begin sample collection now.”

Day 6 ends Wednesday at 11 a.m. EST, or when a majority kill vote is reached