Warwilf 87: Mystery Violence Theater 3000 – Day 5

It was Christmastime! No need to be afraid. On Christmastime, we let in light and we banish shade. And that’s exactly what jolly old Santa Claus did, as he made his way from cabin to cabin, munching on cookies, drinking milk, and leaving presents behind for all the good test subjects.

He stopped at the last door. “Hmm,” he said, consulting his list. “It looks like we still have one naughty little troublemaker on board! I’m afraid I’ll have to fill this stocking with a lump of coal. Ho, ho, ho!”

“The only thing you’ll be filling is a grave,” said a voice behind him.

“Now, now,” Santa said, waggling one white-gloved finger. “You can’t threaten Santa Claus, you know. Santa Claus has powerful friends in Washington. Ho, ho, ho!”

He heard the sound of a gun being cocked, and a moment later, the barrel was pressed to his temple.

“You can’t shoot me now,” Santa argued. “My reindeer are watching. You don’t have enough bullets for all of them.”

He glanced over to the reindeer. Each of them was munching on a fat orange carrot. Cupid chuckled darkly. “We didn’t see nuttin’!”

“Oh, dear,” Santa said. “It looks like Christmas may be cancelled this year.”


Lamb Dance has died. Lamb Dance was a TEST SUBJECT (Town) and was also ARAM FINGAL.

[You are a Test Subject (town) and you are also Aram Fingal! During the night, you may dopple into any other player and observe their actions. If they have a role, you will also learn their name, but NOT their powers or their alignment. The Cymbal-Banging Monkey will appear under a false name. You win when all scum are eliminated.]

The next morning, the detective looked down at the Santa-shaped chalk outline and sighed. “Damn shame. They blew the guy’s head off right in front of his reindeer. Poor things still won’t talk–too traumatized.”

“Ma’am,” the eager rookie said, lowering the phone from his ear, “I just got a call from the morgue. Apparently the, uh–” He looked a little green. “The subject’s brain was–gone.”


“Well, where is it?”

“Isn’t it obvious?” the detective said, gesturing to the splatter pattern. “On Dasher, on Dancer, on Prancer and Vixen. On Comet, on Cupid, on Donner and Blitzen.”


Player Roll Call

Flubba (Mikey the Mike Sprite)CYMBAL BANGING MONKEY (Serial Killer)

Josephus (Reb Brown)

Mr. I’m My Own Grandfather (Zap Rowsdower)

Hoho (Greasy Possum)


Sister Jude (Harried MST3K Writer)REBEL TEST SUBJECT (Wolf) – GODZILLA

E-dog (E-Dog)

Goat (Pumaman)

Mayelbridwen (Giant Lobster)(REBEL) TEST SUBJECT (Wolf Recruit) – THE MASTER

Louie (A Can of Hamdingers)TEST SUBJECT (Town) – WHITEY


Donalbain (Phil Mitchell)TEST SUBJECT (Town) – THE SCREAMING SKULL

Clodia (Skeleton Army)WILD CARD TEST SUBJECT (Unaligned) – JIMMY WILSON

Spooky (John Mulaney)

Mr. Glitch (The Amazing Colossal Man)TEST SUBJECT (Town)

Wasp (Mr. B Natural)

Captain Video (Commander Dobler)TEST SUBJECT (Town) – MAC

Ralph (Bill Dudley)

Sukaluski (Scruffy)

Grumproro (Johnny)TEST SUBJECT (Town) – TRUMPY

Lamb Dance (Santa Claus)TEST SUBJECT (Town) – Aram Fingal


This experiment contains:

Fourteen Eight Test Subjects (town). I won’t give you ALL the details, but they include more than one one-shot vigilante, a doctor, a jailer, an investigator, and a spy who can observe night actions, among other things both useful and not-so-useful.

Four Five Three One Rebel Test Subject (wolf). These space mutineers have one recruiter, one rebel who won’t read as a rebel, one vanilla rebel, and someone who can do something else that will be an unpleasant surprise if it happens. A specific Rebel Test Subject is assigned to perform the killings each night. If they are killed or blocked, the next one in the line of succession takes the job, and so on.

No Wild Card Test Subjects (unaligned.) All Wild Cards are either dead, or have completed their win conditions and become regular Town players.

No more Cymbal-Banging Monkeys jumping on the bed.

Named roles and allegiances are revealed upon death. So are powers…mostly.

Some roles are SECRET. The roled player loses their power if they publically reveal either the name of their role or its power. They do not lose the power if these things are revealed through any other method.

A tie at Movie Sign=no kill. There’s plenty of other ways to die in this thing.

The Pant Association urges you to wear your pants at least three times per day, and the Post Association recommends you post at least as often! Please don’t quote directly from QTs,  no editing posts, and let’s all be awesome to each other and have fun!

Movie Sign will be on Sunday, March 24, at 7:00 PM Central US time.