When “Escape (The Piña Colada Song)” stops playing, Rafto looks around.
“The fuck is with you freaks and killing yourselves? Can’t a man drink and dance around in peace?”
Behind you, you hear a struggle. When you turn around, Flocculent Fissure is also dead on the floor.
Flocculent Fissure has died. He was vanilla town.
“See, that’s exactly the kind of shit I mean,” says Rafto, pulling a flask out of his pocket.
“Aren’t you going to DO SOMETHING?” splutters Sgt. Grumps, the specialist. Rafto doesn’t hear her over how hard the flask is glugging.
“What?” he says, vodka running down his chin. “Is this about your car? I only crashed it a little.”
While all this was happening, nobody noticed Berk stick his head in and hand the working EviSync to the person closest to the door.
There is now a new inspector.
“You dipshits need to learn how to party,” says Rafto, reaching for the radio. “Should have some Jimmy Buffett coming right up-”
But what comes out of the radio isn’t Jimmy Buffett. As “Escape (The Piña Colada Song)” fades out, it’s replaced by weird violin music. The notes sound wrong, like something a 12-note scale couldn’t produce. Rafto stuffs the empty flask down the front of his pants and curses.
“Fuckin’ Top 40 stations.” He leans over and yells in the speaker. “HAVE SOME RESPECT FOR THE CLASSICS, ASSHOLE.” But when he turns the dial, the music continues. In fact, when he turns the radio off, the music only gets louder.
“Uh oh,” he says, and yanks the cursed amulet back out of his shirt. It’s now pulsing red.
“Ah shit,” says Rafto, as the lights begin to flicker. You’re suddenly surrounded by a host of figures in black robes, their faces hidden in the dark folds of strange fabric. The only parts of them you can see are their hands, which are dark gray. The fingers are inhumanly long, and seem to have too many joints.
“Ahhh shiiiiit,” says Rafto again, clutching the radio. “Is that today? I thought you said I had to do the 30-day plan first.”
The figures answer by stepping forward, pressing past you. From the folds of their robes comes a foreign and ancient smell.
“Alright kids,” says Rafto, as the dark figures surround him, “it looks like my motherfuckin’ appointment to get my consciousness abducted is this week instead of next week. Shit.”
The figures have him surrounded now, laying hands upon him. He drops the radio.
“This better be a fuckin’ nice-ass plant you stick my mind in,” he says accusingly. He drunkenly pops up on tiptoes to see over their shoulders. “Remember, kids,” he says, as the room fills with dark light, “alcoholism is only funny until it happens to someone you knooooooooow!”
His voice trails off in a thunderclap, and everything is dark for a second. You stand there, shaking.
Gert Rafto has died(?) He was drunk as fuck and proud of it.
You’re on your own now.
- forget_it_jake – Detective Luce Hole
Owen1120 – Doktor Proktor– The first inspector
- A Winged Potato – Detective John Shaft (replacement for liz156)
Capt.LindsayFünke – Anita Glasscox– The second inspector Mello Yello Enthusiast – Hugh G. Jizztracks– Cop Lutair – Flocculent Fissure(replacement for Cuttles) – Cop
- MacCrocodile – Richard Peter Nuss
Snugglewumps – Detective Superintendent Stella Gibson– Cop Pulprobot – Major Bill Jobs– Cop Smapti Jones – Officer Snowman Jones– Cop
- Hotline BannerThief – Officer “BannerThief” Vakarian
JonHamm’sJohnHam – Officer Ralph “Lefty” Hamjab– Serial Killer
- Doctor Nick – Col. Angus Nuss
- Zecko – Pistachio Lee, Ace Detective
Creeper – Inspector Moufdo InDEEEEED – Officer Indy Rumpe– Cop GIRsCupcake– Bad cop
- Grumproro – Sgt. Grumps – The Specialist
111 cop (vanilla town)
- 1 investigator (true cop). If the investigator is killed, the position will be back-filled by a randomly selected townie after one in-game day.
- 1 jailkeeper. This role will NOT be back-filled if they are killed.
42 bad cops (mafia) 1 rogue cop (serial killer)
- 1 Specialist (alright fine she’s town)
- The investigator role will always be backfilled from the vanilla town population. If there are no more vanilla town members left, the role will be left empty.
- The jailer cannot jail themselves, or the same person two days in a row.
- Bad cops (mafia) will show up as BAD COP on the investigator’s EviSync. All others come up COP.
- The bad cops win when they are equal to the number of town-aligned players left.
- Town wins when all the bad cops and the serial killer are defeated.
- Serial killer wins when it comes down to just them and one other person.
- A three-way standoff between the last town, last wolf and SK will result in a special ending.
- A tie at the end of day results in No Lynch. A majority of living players voting for any one person (or No Lynch) ends the day early.
- No editing posts.
- No quoting or screencapping from your QTs.
- If you have any other questions about rules, please ask in QT, and I will answer publicly here.
DAY ENDS: 6 p.m. Eastern on Friday (countdown)