This is gonna be a long one. Where to even begin?

After a relatively quiet offseason last year, the NBA once again figured out how to be the league where the offseason, speculation, and theorizing is somehow the most exciting part to many fans. Last year the second apron seemed to stifle the typically wild free agency. This year, it seemed to encourage even more player movement as teams re-tooled and adjusted around it. We will get into all of that of course, but the main takeaway seems to be that teams that are not actively in contention simply cannot afford to keep aging superstars or the pieces around them. The parity era continues but this felt like a true reckoning and the beginnings of what the second apron will cause long-term. It is very difficult to thread the needle properly now as windows open and close in the blink of single seasons. Of course one team’s window closing often opens another and maybe quick turnarounds both ways will become the norm. We’ll come back to all that but for now…

The New York Knicks, yes, those Knicks, are NBA champions! A truly absurd and dominate playoff run saw them ripping off win after win with some high drama comebacks and massive blowouts. New York rode good vibes that even Dolan and Fuckface couldn’t ruin. If I could use this space for a moment and be indulged, and really how can you stop me? I want to tell a bit of a story. I shared this in the comments before, but my Uncle Ron was a massive sports fan who wove himself into the sports landscape of his community in New York/New Jersey. His company made shirts and gear and trophies for local sports leagues. “Mr. Old Bridge” was an award-winning announcer for local high school and college teams in various sports, mostly football and wrestling but he dipped into everything. He was so well known that he formed some relationships with minor league teams and managers. When he would visit us in the south every Summer, we would all go to a game for our local minor league baseball team. The manager was a former Met and my Uncle Ron, never shy and never denied, somehow reached out and met up with the manager after a game. He had a knack for being a fan of the “wrong” New York team as he was a proud Mets and Jets fan watching the Yankees and Giants win titles. He was also a Knicks fan, and he and I would talk all the time and commiserate about our respective franchises for whom nothing seemed to ever go right.

He passed away unexpectedly in 2022 and didn’t get to see this iteration of the Knicks. Multiple sporting events are now named after him in New Jersey and New York while local teams, from high school to minor league, held events and moments of silence in his honor. He would have loved this and would have been texting me nonstop. I am not religious, but I hope that whatever lies on the other side, he somehow got to see his long-suffering Knicks succeed. May he boo Dolan with his entire spirit.

I thank you for indulging me and may we never forget the strange and stupid and awesome power of sports that we all care way too much about. May everyone get to see their team win a championship. Go Knicks. Now kindly fuck off.

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Anyway! We all know what happened last season, and we cover the playoffs and games extremely well in our thousands of comments in the playoffs threads, so I won’t rehash much more. And thus, where should we start, oh I know!

After literally a year the NBA investigation into the Clippers led by Wachtell, Lipton, Rosen & Katz came to a close and resulted in a $30 million fine, Ballmer being banned for a year, and the forfeiture of 5 first round draft picks. All for the only trophy to be Pablo Torre’s Pulitzer. Should’ve planted a tree. Look, Adam Silver needed to get some swag back and went to what earned him his stripes in the first place, punishing the Clippers. We can debate forever whether it was enough or how much difference it will really end up making but personally I feel like the feared slap on the wrist was avoided, the last of ESPN’s journalistic cachet died in the crossfire, and Kawhi fled the country. I do feel bad for Clippers fans, but what is being a Clippers fan if not choosing suffering?

Go East, Old Man

Well, player movement is back. The Parity Era continues as modern teambuilding has seemingly forced GMs to essentially get everything correct for 5 or 6 years to get a title window nudged open which then slams shut quickly the very moment ~2 role players get too expensive. There was a lot of player movement this offseason both in trades and free agency as teams mixed things up and re-tooled. The bigger ones include, Giannis, Jaylen Brown, LeBron, LaMelo, Kawhi, Paul George, Ja Morant, and the list goes on.

The Lakers got sold, nothing to see there. Gambling and “prediction markets” (see: Gambling) continue to infect the league, nothing to see there. They totally fixed tanking forever!* Let’s just get into the teams.

Boston Celtics

And thus the Tatum and Brown era comes to an end. After some Giannis potential it ends up being Paul George coming in from the Brown trade, and Mitchell Robinson also arrives to help stabilize the frontcourt. This version of the Celtics is likely a tier below the very top contenders at this point and it remains to be seen if they will adjust their “take all the 3s” playstyle. This has been an extremely successful last half decade for the Celtics in terms of record plus the 2024 title and it is unlikely that they just disappear. However, I still think losing Brown is huge deal and 2026 Paul George simply is not an equivalent replacement.

Philadelphia 76ers

A lot to talk about here obviously. Outside of Maxey and Embiid this is almost an entirely new roster. Let’s start with the obvious. Jaylen Brown is here now which also led to LeBron being here now alongside the returning core of Maxey and whatever is left of Embiid’s body. V.J. Edgecombe spent long stretches of last year looking like the best rookie in the class and if this team can share the ball enough to get everyone involved they are going to look ridiculous on the nights everyone is playing. But that’s the key thing. LeBron is still LeBron but father time is undefeated and he is 41 years old and only played 60 games last year. Which is still far and away better than Embiid’s 38. In fact, since his MVP season Embiid has not cracked 40 games played in a season. The thing is, Maxey, Edgecombe, and Brown can be their own 3 headed monster on nights they don’t have LeBron or Embiid, but they’re going to need production from their bench and role players for this new look team to break into the upper echelon of established contenders.

Toronto Raptors

Hey Kawhi is back! (this team might be weirdly good)

Brooklyn Nets

Name a player on the Nets without looking it up. I’ll wait….did you remember Michael Porter Jr. was here? How about that Julius Randle is now? Remember when they made 5 first round picks in the 2025 draft and none of them made the all-rookie teams? (This is mean, Egor is fine.)

New York Knicks

Still feels strange to say the Knicks won a title. There also isn’t really a reason they can’t do so again with everyone else in the East getting new looks and lacking the continuity New York has, even if losing Robinson will be a blow. They come in as the favorites in the East for sure. Enjoy it now because the second apron of Damocles is looming with KAT and Josh Hart entering the season without extensions. Ironically, expect the talk to be similar this year as it was last year, with the Thunder and Spurs propped up as the top teams and the Knicks sitting below them. Well last year the Knicks got through anyway. This is almost entirely the same team, and that depth and experience will serve them well once again. It would be wild for the Knicks to be the team that breaks through and repeats in the parity era.

Milwaukee Bucks

It is rebuilding time as the Giannis era comes to an end. What a ride it was. This is now the Herro and Kuzma show for however long even that lasts. I know we have a lot of Bucks fans here, and I certainly loved the Giannis era, but this team is likely going to compete for the worst team in the league.

Chicago Bulls

The Bulls will be integrating 4th overall pick Caleb Wilson as they look to enter a new era and that is the last thing I remember about the Bulls. Uh, *googles… oh cool Norm Powell is here! That’s a good piece of business. He definitely won’t be traded. Buddy Hield? Claxton? Okoro? Oh right Josh Giddey. I think that sums up the Bulls right now, a collection of some decent-to-good players but really a team looking to develop for the future.

Cleveland Cavaliers

Pundits can be as high on the Cavs as they want to be this is James Harden in the playoffs and that only ends one way. I actually do like the team honestly and think the Peyton Watson acquisition was great but well, Harden. Hey Mario Herzonja is back in the NBA that’s actually kinda fun!

Indiana Pacers

It’s all about Haliburton coming back. After taking the Thunder to 7 in the 2025 Finals the Pacers played all of 2025-26 without their engine. It showed as they went 19-63. They add Larry Nance and Kelly Oubre to the rotation but as we all know the real addition is a hopefully healthy Haliburton. The question is will his return be enough in a likely deeper Eastern Conference?

Detroit Pistons

The Pistons finished as a 60-win team last year and the 1 seed in the East. But for much of the year I personally kept hearing and reading that they wouldn’t translate well to the playoffs. Well, they kinda didn’t, losing in the second round with Duren in particular forcing a very uncomfortable standoff in the offseason as he became borderline unplayable down the stretch. The Pistons could comfortably argue that with more experience they should be right back in competition towards the top of the East. But the East also looks very different this year and while we don’t know that all these new look teams will actually work, it’s worth keeping in mind. John Collins and Isaiah Joe are their big additions but Cade truly just needs help, as he is the only returning player to average more than 12 points in the playoffs last year (Tobias Harris was the other).

Miami Heat

It obviously starts and ends with Giannis who now joins Bam Adebayo in Miami. That is an interesting pairing that could be an absolute force on defense but feels limited in the halfcourt offense despite Bam’s 83-point game last year. To help round things out, the Heat also signed Klay Thompson and Tim Hardaway Jr. to at least provide the idea of spacing, but that is an aging group, and this is not splash brother Klay anymore, who averaged career lows in points and 3P% last year. Hardaway meanwhile sneakily finished 3^rd in Sixth Man of the Year voting. It is very unclear as I write this who is actually going to play point guard but it is the Heat, months from now we’ll be watching someone we’ve never heard of light it up as the 6^th seed in the playoffs. Despite making one of the bigger offseason splashes, the Heat still feel like a middle of the pack team with upside and again feel a tier below the top contenders.

Atlanta Hawks

Charlotte Hornets

Charlotte moves on from its previous core of LaMelo and Miles Bridges while handing the keys to Brandon Miller and Coby White. I can see this being disappointing as the team will likely be worse in the short term and shifting in identity after looking like they began turning a corner last year.

Washington Wizards

This is a really fun NBA 2k20 roster with Trae Young, Anthony Davis, Deandre Ayton and Khris Middleton but unfortunately, it’s 2026 and real life. Fun fact there are three 1^st overall picks on this team. By far the most important thing is getting AJ Dybantsa acclimated to the NBA and figuring out who fits around him. Between the inevitable injuries and possible trades this current roster may never even play a game together.

Orlando Magic

Orlando was one of the bigger disappointments last season and it resulted in the firing of Jamahl Mosley and the subsequent hiring of Sean Sweeney. Roster wise, the Magic largely stay the same but with Nikola Vucevic returning. This might be the last run that they give this core especially because they are paying almost as much in luxury tax this year as they have in the entire history of the franchise.

Utah Jazz

The Jazz always fly under the radar ‘cus ya know, Utah, but they actually might be pretty frisky and fun this year. Lauri Markkanen is still here. Darren Peterson is a very exciting rookie. Ace Bailey will keep developing. Keyonte George got paid. Fun stuff.

Denver Nuggets

It feels like the Nuggets have been left a step behind after being knocked out of the playoffs by the Timberwolves again. Then I saw that Jokic pass in the preseason and I wanted to believe so hard again. But really, they bring back the same starting lineup but lose important depth in Tim Hardaway Jr., Jonas Valanciunas, Bruce Brown, and Peyton Watson. They did sign DeMar DeRozan and his fit next to Jokic is going to be fascinating to watch. I’m genuinely excited to see that and hope DeMar has something left in the tank. Players like Strawther, Braun, and even Cam Johnson who I loved, simply haven’t done enough next to Jokic and Murray while Aaron Gordon was hurt again last year. They just fell behind the Thunder and Spurs in the West and potentially even the Wolves and Rockets. It’s stupid to bet against Jokic though.

Minnesota Timberwolves

After making two straight conference finals the Wolves lost in the second-round last season but were admittedly very injured. They did eliminate the Nuggets again to get there as they continue to be designed to beat them which is funny to keep see working. The Wolves decided to mix things up in a pretty big way, trading for LaMelo Ball to pair next to Anthony Edwards. Personally, I have no idea what that is going to look like. Some nicknames stolen from the internet: The Smash Brothers, Hit and Run, Baby Driver. In more serious analysis, Jaden McDaniels may be ready to take his game to another level. Avocado favorite Rudy Gobert is still anchoring the defense. Kuminga will have something to do presumably. And role players like DiVincenzo and Dosunmu are around to contribute.

Portland Trailblazers

Rest assured, Blazers owner Tom Dundon would never get caught paying extra to players because he can’t be bothered paying anyone even a normal amount. Holy shit Ja Morant is here now? Surely Portland has stricter gun laws right? Scoot Henderson and Jrue Holiday are also here. They won’t pay a coach or staff but they’ll sure pay 9 guards.

Oklahoma City Thunder

Mat Ishbia said they’ll win a playoff series this year and who am I to not believe him?

Golden State Warriors

Jimmy Butler is 37 years old coming off an ACL tear and the Warriors essentially did nothing all offseason aside from draft Yaxel Lendeborg. I would never count Curry (38 years old himself) out but to me it feels like we’re nearing the end of the ride. We’ll soon be 5 years removed from that last title run. That somehow doesn’t mean they won’t be in the mix at the end of the year because with the play-in everyone that’s even competent gets a chance and if Jimmy and Curry are somehow both healthy and fully themselves at the end that’s not nothing. They did pay Podz a lot of money too. Draymond is still here to collect his technical fouls and paycheck in that order. Go Valkyries!

Los Angeles Clippers

t’s time to move on from the mistakes and pain of the past and focus instead on the pain of the present like how Brandon Ingram was discovered to have a torn Achilles after the trade.

Los Angeles Lakers

The LeBron era of the Lakers comes to a close so that the Bronny era can begin. In all seriousness this is now firmly Luka’s team and the Lakers made some significant moves in the offseason, losing 6 players to free agency and bringing in 8 new ones. The biggest moves were the sign-and-trade for Walker Kessler and the re-signing of Austin Reaves. They’ll need strong production and support around Luka if they want to return to competing for titles, and this is a team that is going to be actively figuring out what they have put together here. Plus, don’t forget about Luka just because some new kids on the block came around, he’s still a perennial top 5 MVP candidate when healthy and they are trying to build a “Luka team” like he had in Dallas.

Sacramento Kings

This entire thing was a Ben Simmons joke but I’m editing it after his Achilles tear. They’ll be bad.

Memphis Grizzlies

Grit & Grind might be back just with less talent. This team is going to be annoying to play against but not very good.

Dallas Mavericks

Obviously everything starts and ends with Cooper Flagg but Kyrie is actually coming back after 19 months(!) away from basketball. For this year, it is really all up to how good Flagg can be and how quickly. Lively is already dealing with an injury and Kyrie is being talked up as a trade target for many contending teams before the deadline.

New Orleans Pelicans

They can’t hurt me if I don’t let them. Same as it ever was. Zion had arguably his healthiest season ever and it resulted in 26 wins. Expect the team to mostly be interesting for other teams’ trade rumors.

San Antonio Spurs

Last year the Spurs arrived ahead of schedule, took down the Thunder, and made a run to the finals while somehow giving Wemby a villain arc. Well they aren’t a surprise anymore as they enter this year as one of the favorites in the West assuming good health. Wemby will be in contention for both DPOY and MVP and they appear to be starting the year running a 3 guard lineup, which is the kind of thing you can do when you have 12 feet of rim protection behind you. I cannot emphasize enough that they were in the Finals last year and their key players are barely old enough to drink, and some still can’t. That actually should give some wiggle room as they continue to grow as a team. I still feel like if Pop was coaching they win the title last year.

Houston Rockets

The Rockets were derailed last season after Fred VanVleet tore his ACL just before the start of the season. They never really found an answer at point guard the rest of the year and finished 5^th in the West, losing in the first round to the Lakers after Durant was only able to play a single game in the series. VanVleet returning should be a not insignificant upgrade to their distribution and offense while they add Marcus Smart to do Marcus Smart things and Bogdan Bogdanović to add more shooting. The Rockets will be one of those teams occupying the crowded tier below the Thunder and Spurs in the West and hoping to make that leap up.

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With that, we come to a close. I do think this is going to be a very interesting season. The East is likely stronger than the West overall, and yet the top two favorites are in the West. Most outlets I’ve seen have a clear top 3 contenders of the Thunder, Spurs, and Knicks, followed by an absolute cluster of teams hoping something bounces their way. At the same time, with the new anti-tanking rules, we may see tight competition at the very bottom of the league as teams try to avoid being in the bottom 3. There are a lot of new faces on a lot of teams this year as well and what they look like throughout the year will be some of the key stories to follow. Keep in mind we should also be getting further news on potential expansion soon as the NBA is weighing bids for Las Vegas and Seattle but Silver has also made some calculated statements about a potential team in Mexico.

Finally, this was all in good fun, I continue to be an expert at nothing so take everything I say exactly as it is meant, an idiot yelling about basketball. Have a great season everyone, good luck, and as always this post can serve as an opening week thread for a while as well.