Second in a series of three. Because once you start ranking things by how about something they are it’s hard to stop.

Criteria: Song had to reasonably refer to riding a wave in a surf-like fashion and/or contain a surfing term. General ocean/nautical/sailor imagery did not count. Because then there would have been like 50 songs on this list and I don’t have that much free time.

1. Insignificance (Binaural, 2000)
   • Reference: “The plates began to shift/Perfect lefts come rolling in/I was alone and far away, hey/When I heard the band start playin’/On the lip…late take off/Bombs, dropping down/Overhead, underground/It’s instilled to wanna live”
   • Surfing-ness: This is not a song about surfing. It’s a song about ::checks notes:: apologizing on behalf of the city of Seattle for the bombs made at the Boeing factory in Seattle. (Look, Pearl Jam’s gonna Pearl Jam). But the “perfect lefts” and “on the lip” bits are surfing terms so here we are on the list.
     
     
2. Corduroy (Vitalogy, 1994)
   • Reference: title
   • Surfing-ness: The titular corduroy is first and foremost in reference to a jacket. But the word can also refer to a series of low rolling waves, and this bouncy song written by a surfer about navigating the bumpy road of fame is probably not not also referencing that meaning. And while the bumpy road of fame isn’t quite in line with the mellow surfing vibe we’re going for, it does seem more mellow than ::checks #8 again:: bombs so here it is in not last place.
     
     
3. Oceans (Ten, 1991)
   • Reference: “Hold on to the thread/The currents will shift/Glide me towards you/Know something’s left/And we’re all allowed to dream of the next/Oh the next/Time we touch”
   • Surfing-ness: Okay, here we go. We’re clearly in the ocean this time. That’s a good start. But are we surfing? The only explicit reference to watersports equipment is “hold tight to the ring,” which, a ring is not a surfboard.¹ But the “glide” bit feels surf-y. Also this song is hella mellow. Way chiller than the previous entries. So my final scientific assessment is that the song makes the list at #6.
     
     
4. Gremmie Out Of Control (Lost Dogs, 2003)
   • Reference: “Every beach has a clown who thinks he knows it all./And he’s always practicing his cowabunga call./But the menace scrambles when the big waves start to roll./‘Cause there’s nothing worse then a gremmie out of control.”
   • Surfing-ness: This is a charity cover of an old surf rock song, which you would think would place it higher on the list. But, at the end of the day, it’s less a song about surfing and more a song about Stone Gossard randomly shouting “cowabunga.” It would be #1 on a list of songs about rhythm guitarists randomly shouting cowabunga, for sure.
     
     
5. Release (Ten, 1991)
   • Reference: “Oh dear dad/Can you see me now/I am myself/Like you somehow/I’ll ride the wave/Where it takes me/I’ll hold the pain/Release me”
   • Surfing-ness: Surfing as a metaphor for navigating grief. Is pretty intense, but somehow both intense and mellow at the same time? Gets bonus points for also being about surfing in a meta way, in that the lyrics were made up on the fly in the studio. A great #4.
     
     
6. Big Wave (Pearl Jam, 2006)
   • Reference: “I used to be crustacean/In an underwater nation/And I surf in celebration/Of a billion adaptations”
   • Surning-ness: This song on the surface has a lot of words about surfing in it, but I’m pretty sure it’s actually about secular humanism? You know how songs just end up being about secular humanism sometimes? But, I dunno, secular humanism can be kind of mellow. In its own way. So here we are at number 3.
     
     
7. Amongst the Waves (Backspacer, 2009)
   • Reference: “And once outside the undertow/Just you and me, and nothing more/If not for love I would be drowning/I’ve seen it work both ways, but I am up/Riding high amongst the waves”
   • Surfing-ness: This one, like “Oceans,” is kind of a love song, and like “Big Wave” is also kind of about secular humanism, which is two surfing metaphors in one. So it has to rank higher than both of them. That’s just math. Also, like “Gremmie,” it raised funds for an ocean conservation charity. Which all adds up to ::scientific chalkboard scribbling:: #2 on the list.
     
     
8. Given To Fly (Yield, 1998)
   • Refrerence: “A wave came crashin’ like a fist to the jaw/Delivered him wings, “Hey, look at me now”/Arms wide open with the sea as his floor/Oh, power, oh/He’s flyin’, whole/High, wide, oh”
   • Surfing-ness: Look, if you’re going to write a song about surfing, it might as well be about a person who goes surfing and thereby redeems all of humankind with their love. Go big or go home. Musically, the listener can even, like, aurally surf on the cresting wave of the ::looks up music term:: pre-chorus (?). Anyhoo, it doesn’t get any surfier than this. In sum, A+, no notes, would still give my love, just give it away again.
     

Album track’s in the link but I love a live version. Best live version is this one with sign language interpretation(!) from 2000 but it won’t embed right in WordPress, so let’s pick, say, this one from Buenos Aires in 2013, the crowd is having a great time. Surfing on the moment if you will. (Thematic cohesion, nailed it.)

1. Yes, yes, “a little love song I wrote about my surfboard” but we’re sticking to what’s in the text itself. We go full death-of-the-author in Avocado OT header song rankings. ↩︎

Happy Day Threading!