Elaine buys golf clubs for J Peterman, only for them to be accidentally stolen by Jerry’s mechanic, who has stolen his car in a rage. George receives instructions for a project, but doesn’t hear them, and has to bluff his way through. Kramer and Newman attempt to make money through a bottle deposit scheme.

Written by: Gregg Kavet and Andy Robin
Directed by: Andy Ackerman

Occasionally, when there’s been a two-parter, commentors have remarked that it tends to feel stretched out and not really worth it, and I gotta say, I feel that about this one. I generally enjoy Seinfeld‘s minimalist approach to comedy, but here it feels like they’ve stretched out a few jokes past their humour. I feel you can best see this with the way Kramer’s basic plot at the end involves a decent comic escalation idea – abandoning first Newman, then Jerry, to prioritise Elaine and the golf clubs – but takes too long to get there and too long to move through them. Still, there’s a lot to like here; Tony the mechanic is a very Seinfeldian concept with a very Seinfeldian payoff, being a professional who is not only pedantic about what he does, but judgemental towards Jerry for failing to live up to it, to the point of getting so emotionally invested in the car that he steals it to protect it.

The interesting thing about writing and especially writing comedy is how much ‘every accusation is a confession’ is an integral part of the process. One thing we know about the writing process was how fastidious it was; Seinfeld (comedian) himself is famously fastidious about his comic act, relentlessly beating the crap out of every line until it’s as polished as possible, and he definitely brought that energy as a producer (see also the documentary on his comeback after the show finished, attempting to rebuild his career from scratch). I suspect the writers projected that kind of approach to other careers, if not directly as a kind of self-criticism, then at least recognising that it’s hilarious – a slight embarrassment at not taking everything as seriously as you take comedy.

Meanwhile, George’s story is another example of him following through on thoughts we all have. Thinking about it, most people would simply push through the embarrassment; George is doing everything possible to avoid embarrassment, and ends up escalating it far beyond what any normal person would endure. If there’s one ‘lesson’ the show indulges in – and it barely does – it’s the idea that trying to avoid work will only lead to more work and trying to avoid suffering will only increase it. You can even kind of see this in Elaine’s story; her attempt to spite Sue Ellen is what inspires her to try for the golf clubs, when Elaine could have avoided all that by simply not pushing her.

TOPICS O’ THE WEEK

• Brad Garrett is fantastic as Tony, bringing a white-hot sincerity – “The washer fluid is not fine!”
• “I’m here to catch a glimpse. Of high… society.”
• “I really thought you had her there at $17,000.”
• The image of Jerry’s car covered in groceries is fantastic.
• George’s face before launching into “I urge you to take him up on it!” is so great – Jason Alexander selling that George has immediately realised the solution to his problem is at hand.
• Where the bottle deposit scheme all falls down, of course, is they could have put the same hours into a minimum wage job – even an American minimum-wage job – and made much more money.
• Seinfeld (comedian) knowing to say “Downtown” as seriously as possible, and in a different way each time. Combined with Jason Alexander putting his whole brain into solving the problem.
• “Where do I find these guys?”
• “We’re right on this guy like stink on a monkey!” Such a Kramer line.
• “Love this magnifying glass, I feel like scientist.”
• “My truck was just ambushed by a bunch of backwoods mail-hating survivalists!” This, on the other hand, is such a Newman line. It’s not just that he would say that, but that he believes it would be something someone finds convincing.
• “I never knew Kennedy had such a temper.”

Biggest Laugh:

Next Week: “The Wait Out”