The King & I came to theaters on this day 25 years ago. Produced by Rankin/Bass Productions (yes, really), it was intended to be the first in a series of animated Rodgers and Hammerstein Broadway musical remakes. Obviously, this didn’t end up happening, as The King & I flopped hard, grossing only $11 million, so we never got to see a cartoon Sound of Music in which Maria has to dodge flying dragons while singing about how the hills are alive. Because, yes, The King & I remake did add fucking magic to the story.

Directed by Richard Rich (that’s his real name, folks), who used to work for Disney before helming The Swan Princess, The King & I is insane. There’s an evil prime minister who pulls double duty as an evil sorcerer. He wants to stop Anna from getting close to the King for reasons, and he has the ability to create evil sea serpents, bring evil statues to life, and other evil shit. So he’s like Rasputin from Anastasia, except not as cool, and instead of a talking bat as his assistant, he has…um…a character called “Master Little.” Master Little is…um…well…I don’t know if I should even post pictures of him here. Well, okay, I can post this one, but no others. Just Google him if you’re curious, guys. Or watch the movie.

There’s also not one, but three cute animals, and I’m not going to look up their names, but there’s a monkey who does monkey stuff, a panther who is like the King’s personal bodyguard (maybe?), and a baby elephant who is, you know, an elephant. There’s also a forbidden romance involving one of the princes (which also includes a kickboxing subplot), and a hot air balloon chase in which they play with audience expectations by having the King appear to die like he did in the original movie (only not in a hot air balloon). SPOILER ALERT: The King does not die, but then again, he didn’t die in the other remake from 1999–the Oscar-bait Anna & the King with Jodie Foster and Chow Yun-Fat–either. Also, the evil prime minister/sorcerer is “defeated” by being given a job in the elephant stable cleaning up manure, as I guess “being given a job” counts as an appropriate punishment for treason against the crown so long as it involves poop.

The King and I did have a fairly solid marketing campaign to back it up (for all the good it did), including a series of dolls, a CD-ROM game, and a collection of toys at Subway. Yes, Subway used to have actual toys in their kids meals, with this batch including the aforementioned Master Little, the aforementioned baby elephant, some little kid from the movie, and Anna and the King. Sadly there were no toys for the evil sorcerer, the evil serpent, or the evil statues. Also, I love how this commercial is narrated like an old Blue Cross & Blue Shield ad.

Have a magical night, y’all!