The Night Thread Celebrates The Bourne Identity–Just Kidding You’re Getting More Scooby-Doo Instead!

20 years ago today, The Bourne Identity opened in theaters. It was a kick-ass action movie that played like a double-shot of adrenaline, launching not only a franchise, but Matt Damon as an A-list blockbuster star (would he have been able to buy a zoo without this film? Probably not).

But we’re not here to talk about that. We’re here to talk about Scooby-Doo some more.

Naturally, a big budget family flick like Scooby-Doo had a number of promotional partners, including Dairy Queen, which had a special Blizzard with a cool movie-themed cup. Sadly, I never tried one of these. In fact, I wasn’t even aware they existed at the time, nor did I know that DQ did kid’s meals WITH TOYS (squee!) back in the day. I can only imagine what they must’ve tasted like. Alas, I shall never know, unless Rick & Morty references it someday, in which case I might have a chance…

I don’t know about you, but I could REALLY go for some ice cream right now. Like I mean I’m craving it BAD!

The commercial features some kid named “Scott” who starts broadcasting from The Mystery Machine, claiming he’s trying to solve the “mystery” of the new Scooby-Doo Blizzard. Okay, nice try, “Scott” (if that is even your real name), but I’m onto you. I know you snuck into The Mystery Machine without the gang’s permission, probably as a means to get some free ice cream. Just you wait until I tell Fred what you’re doing. The Hell you go to when you die will seem like Heaven compared to the trap that Fred is going to trap you in, Scott! You hear me, Scott? Trespassing is NOT cool, Scott!

Have a GROOVY day, Avocados!