“Quash the poltroons! Flimmer the goobknots! Hashtag the mainsails! And in the name of all that’s holy, twerk the slubberdegullions!” The pirate possum’s loud but admittedly squeaky nonsense rang out all over the ship, where his crewmates had learned largely to just sort of ignore it, having already done a yeoman’s job of convincing themselves he wasn’t actually a rat.
As Hoho Yo Ho scurried about the bilge hold, he came face to face with a spectral skeleton, who intoned in a deeply weary, tired voice: “Look, it’s not you. It’s the boss. He’s a lot of things: pirate, legend, undead rage-fueled lovelorn zombie, currently incorporeal. He has killed a lot of people in his time. But what he’s won’t stand for—” the skeleton casually opened his ribcage — “is the way you constantly murder the Queen’s English.”
“Mmmmff—” were the last words of Hoho Yo Ho, as the skeleton stuffed the possum in his chest cavity, slammed the ribcage shut, and then went for a long, leisurely swim in the ocean.
HOHO YO HO, POSSUM PIRATE (hoho) has been killed. They were HERMAN TOOTHROT (Town Fisherman).
At long last, The Pirate Who Likes Sunsets But Is Slightly Less Fond of Kittens Than Previously Assessed spots land from the crow’s nest — a verdant island with tall cliffs and golden beaches! Most prominently, you see a gargantuan stone statue on top of an outcropping; it’s far and away the second biggest monkey head you’ve ever seen! There can be no doubt – you have reached the fabled Monkey Island(TM)!
You take turns landing ashore in the Sea Monkey’s skiff, and set about exploring the island. After a day of mapping out the local hotspots along the beach — which include a tree full of bananas, a tree full of even MORE bananas, a bunch of graffiti and notes in bottles from “H. Toothrot“, and what looks like a disturbingly fresh pile of human bones — you realize that you’re going to need a plan if you’re going to figure out exactly where this fabled Secret(TM) is.
“Hey! Over here!” calls… the disturbingly fresh pile of bones? On taking a closer look, you realize that buried underneath it is a dried, somewhat shrunken head on a necklace, albeit one that’s talking somehow. And – good grief, are those eyeballs on the necklace? It’s, frankly, disgusting, and in the name of keeping your breakfast down you immediately avert your eyes.
“Lemme guess, you’re here for the Secret,” he says. “You and every other landlubber who’s…” he trails off, as he seems to recognize someone in your group. “Well, you’re in luck, sort of. I was the guide for the original crew who found the Secret nearly a hundred years ago! It, uh, didn’t go well, though – the Monkey Island Cannibals(TM) don’t take kindly to intruders, and so now I’m cursed to spend eternity here on the island. Well, my head is, anyway.”
You have so many questions.
“So, you can lead us to the Secret?” asks Murray between dry heaves.
“Oh yeah, that’s the easy part,” replies the Head of the Navigator.
“What’s the hard part?” asks Samuel Arrow.
“Er… let’s uh… let’s just say it always ends up the same way: pirates get to the island, pirates find the Head of the Navigator — that’s me — in a pile of bones, pirates use the Head of the Navigator to find the Secret of Monkey Island(TM), pirates get ambushed by cannibals and end up as the latest addition to the pile of bones. Wash, rinse, repeat.”
You huddle as a group, and decide that with time running short and your crew dwindling, it’s best to take the Head of the Navigator along with you and get to the Secret of Monkey Island(TM) as quickly as possible; the only problem is, none of you want to even look at the grotesque bauble, much less wear it around your neck.
DAY 5 EVENT
Well, someone’s gotta carry the dang thing. In the HEAD OF THE NAVIGATOR THREAD, vote for one player to be assigned to carry the Head of the Navigator. You may not vote for yourself, you may not change your vote, and you may only vote once.
The winner is the player with the most votes at Twilight, and they will be awarded the Head of the Navigator. In the case of a tie, the winner will be determined via RNG between the tied players.
Being buried underneath bones for so long has left the Head of the Navigator with a lot of pent-up conversation he’s dying to get out of his system, and you can only take so much. As a Night Action tonight, the winner may submit the name of another target player to pass a short (max 10 words) message to, along with said message. They may not perform any other Night Actions, as they are too distracted by the Head’s constant conversation to do anything else.
The player targeted will receive the message in their QT, along with the Head of the Navigator.
Luckily, having a disgusting, putrescent chatterbox with eyeballs (so, so many eyeballs) around your neck is good for at least one thing; it’ll be shrieking a warning if anyone tries to sneak up on you in the night. If the player possessing the Head is the target of a (non-blocked) Wolf, Serial Killer, or Vig shot in the night, there is a 50 percent chance that the kill will be blocked, as the Head warns its owner of the impending attack.
Using the Head (HAR!) to send a message and passing it to another player is not mandatory; if the winner of the event chooses not to send a message, then they retain both the Head and the potential Night 5 kill protection.
Wins the game when all Wolves and the SK have been sent to Davy Jones’ Credenza (the graveyard).
PERSONS OF LOW MORAL FIBER™ (5) – Vanilla Town, but don’t call them pirates! Yet.
GUYBRUSH THREEPWOOD (1) – Town Lover. Desperately wants to be a pirate, and desperately in love with Governor Marley. Paired with ELAINE MARLEY, with whom they share a QT. If either Guybrush or Elaine is killed, the other one dies as well. Should Guybrush and Elaine both survive to Day 6, they lose their shared vulnerability, because TRUE LOVE IS MAGICAL.
GOVERNOR ELAINE MARLEY (1) – Town Lover. Strong, smart, fearless Governor of Melee Island, and for reasons she can’t quite explain is in love with Guybrush Threepwood. Paired with GUYBRUSH THREEPWOOD, with whom they share a QT. If either Elaine or Guybrush is killed, the other one dies as well. Should Elaine and Guybrush both survive to Day 6, they lose their shared vulnerability, because TRUE LOVE IS MAGICAL.
HERMAN TOOTHROT (1) – Town Fisherman. Having been cast away for years on Monkey Island™, Herman has developed a knack for fishing. As a Night Action, Herman may choose to fish for one item from the following list, with a percentage chance of success: Spyglass – 25% (1-time use; can use on a player to determine whether Night Actions were performed on or by the player) Musket – 20% (1-time use; Vigilante shot) Bandages – 10% (1-time use; can use on another player to prevent them from being killed at night) Rusty Helmet – 20% (1-time use; provides immunity from night kill to player using it) Message In A Bottle – 15% (1-time use; allows player to ask question of the graveyard)
Once an item has been caught, it may not be caught again. Upon catching the item, Herman must choose to either keep it or send it to another player. The item will be available for use beginning the Night AFTER it was caught. Herman may EITHER Fish OR use any caught items as a Night Action. VOODOO LADY (1) – Town Investigator. As a Night Action, the Voodoo Lady may submit the name of one player to use her mystical powers of foresight (and probably a disturbing amount of snakes) to reveal their alignment (“town” or “scum”). STAN (1) – Town Jailer. Stan is the fast-talking owner of Stan’s Previously Owned Vessels, the only place on Melee Island™ to buy a ship. As a Night Action, Stan may submit the name of one player to corner and give a hard sell to, effectively both roleblocking that player and preventing any number of night kills targeting that player. May not target themselves, nor can they target the same player on consecutive nights.
Win the game when there is no SK and there are as many or more wolves remaining as there are town.
GHOST PIRATE LeCHUCK (1) – Wolf Roleblocker. The legendary Ghost Pirate LeChuck haunts the seas around Melee Island™. As a Night Action, LeChuck will submit the name of one player to cancel any Night Actions carried out by that player. Cannot block the same player on consecutive nights. LeChuck will also designate the Vanilla Wolf that carries out the night kill and will not carry out night kills themself unless no Vanilla Wolves remain. While LeChuck can be killed, legends aren’t so easy to get rid of: if LeChuck is killed, a Vanilla Wolf chosen by RNG becomes The Legend of Ghost Pirate LeChuck (see below), and performs the same functions. This will continue until all wolves are eliminated. If Ghost Pirate LeChuck (the real one, not the legend, we’re not monsters) survives to Night 6, he and any remaining Skeleton Crew receive permanent Night Kill/Vig Shot Immunity, starting Night 6.
STILL THE LEGEND OF GHOST PIRATE LeCHUCK (1) – Wolf Roleblocker. Assigned and activated only if Ghost Pirate LeChuck is killed, or if the current Legend of Ghost Pirate LeChuck is killed (it’s super hard to get rid of Pirate legends). Chosen by RNG from remaining Skeleton Crew. Functions identically to Ghost Pirate LeChuck, despite not actually being LeChuck.
As a Night Action, The Legend of Ghost Pirate LeChuck will submit the name of one player to cancel any Night Actions carried out by that player. Cannot block the same player on consecutive nights. The Legend of Ghost Pirate LeChuck will also designate the Vanilla Wolf that carries out the night kill and will not carry out night kills themselves unless no Vanilla Wolves remain.
STILL, SOMEHOW, ALSO THE LEGEND OF GHOST PIRATE LeCHUCK (?) – Wolf Roleblocker. Assigned and activated only if The Legend of Ghost Pirate LeChuck is killed, or if the current Legend of Ghost Pirate LeChuck is killed (it’s super hard to get rid of Pirate legends). Chosen by RNG from remaining Skeleton Crew. Functions identically to Ghost Pirate LeChuck, despite not actually being LeChuck.
SKELETON CREW (1) – Vanilla Wolf/Backup Wolf Roleblocker. Undead pirates now trapped in service to their ghostly leader for eternity, or whenever they get killed (again). Each Night, one of the Skeleton Crew will be assigned by the Wolf Roleblocker to carry out the night kill. Should the current Wolf Roleblocker be killed, one of the remaining Skeleton Crew will be assigned as The Legend of Ghost Pirate LeChuck (see above) by RNG. This will continue until all wolves are eliminated.
Wins the game if all other players have been sent to Davy Jones’ Credenza (the graveyard).
LEMONHEAD, THE INDIGENOUS VEGETARIAN CANNIBAL (1) – Serial Killer. Cholesterol issues have turned Lemonhead from a bloodthirsty cannibal to a juicethirsty vegetarian. Nonetheless, they’re determined to prevent anyone from discovering the Secret of Monkey Island ™. Each night as a Night Action the Serial Killer will submit the name of one person to be killed. At least they won’t be eaten!
No quoting or screencapping from QTs. Do not ask other players about their QTs in an attempt to figure out what role they have.
You cannot edit any of your posts. I mean, clearly you can, but you shouldn’t, because it’s a clear violation of the Pirate Council bylaws, and if you do that then you can just forget all about becoming a pirate, buddy.
Wolf and SK night kill actions are mandatory. Vig kills, if they become available, are optional.
A tie vote at Twilight results in RNG amongst the tied players.
Be nice: Attack arguments, not people.
Night Action Order of Operations: Blocking > jailing > investigation > fishing > ALL TEH KILLZ.
Remember that play styles differ, and this game is only as fun as people are kind (murderous, but kind). Most importantly, have fun!
- sic – The Pirates Who Don’t Do Anything
Nate – Peter Pan(Vanilla Town) April – Theodore the Octopus(Vanilla Town) MacCrocodile – Antoine DuCrocque(Vanilla Wolf/Backup Wolf Roleblocker)
- Lamb Dance – Sir Davos Seaworth
Goat – Capt. Horatio McCallister, The Frying Dutchman, prop.(Vanilla Town)
- Indy – The Cart Boy
- emm – Kitty Witless
hoho – Hoho Yo Ho. Possum Pirate(Town Fisherman) Lindsay – Pebbles the Parrot(Wolf Roleblocker)
- raven – Cobb the Pirate (Ask Her About LOOM!)
- jake – The Pirate Who Likes Sunsets but Is Slightly Less Fond of Kittens Than Previously Assessed
Side Character – Miguel & Tulio(Vanilla Town) Louie – Dwead Piwate Angela(Town Investigator) Warrior – Monkey Pirate (Pirate Monkey?)(Vanilla Town)
- Lovely Bones – Murray the Demonic Skull
- Flubba – Sam Arrow
- Andiddy – Scurvy
Dicentra – A Library Book(Town Jailer)
- Hayes – Tetra
Twilight is at 5PM PST (8pm EST) on Tuesday, August 3.