The Pet Thread Pays Attention

Anna challenged me to describe my cats, by posting this:

Screen Shot 2019-09-30 at 7.40.28 PM

Mine are

  • Fiver is fluffy and looks like cartoon music is playing in his head at all times.
  • Private Benjamin is black and fat. She has a dust ruffle; please don’t mention it to her. That would be rude.
  • Arrow looks like two different cats stitched together back to front. He also somehow has both a receding chin and a pointy, Disney villain chin. Arrow is very weird.
  • Badger is perfect. Just look for the perfect cat, and you’ll know it’s Badger. Also, he looks like a skunk. And a badger.
  • Pesto is a Fat Kitten with a goatee. He looks like a mob boss. I wrote this before I noticed that the person in the image also describes her cat as a mob boss. There is clearly a mob boss breed of cats.

How about y’all? How would you perfectly describe your pets?