Guy Talk: Men and Control

Welcome to Guy Talk, a serious space to discuss masculinity, good and bad. This week, we are discussing the concept of “control”.

Under patriarchy, men are supposed to be in control – of their emotions, of their body, of the situation – at all times. Of course, reality falls far short of this – some of the most powerful men in the world are emotionally unstable and petty. On the other end of the scale, queer men and men of colour are often infantilised and their choices treated with suspicion or outright repression.

Men can also struggle with control on a personal level – social conditioning often leads us to talk over women, and breaking out of that mindset while still making sure our own needs are acknowledged can be a challenge.

So, what does the word “control” mean to you? Do you feel in control of your own life? How do you cope in positions of leadership and how do you feel when following orders? And do any of these questions affect your view of masculinity and your masculine identity?

Remember that this is a trans-inclusive space, and that is OK to post things that are off-topic, as long as they are about masculinity. Everyone is welcome to comment.