According to the Asexuality Visibility and Education Network, “An asexual person is a person who does not experience sexual attraction.” But it’s more complicated than that. Asexuality is a broad spectrum, and anyone who identities with or has experience on any part of it is welcome to contribute here. No one is actually forbidden from contributing (because I hate that), but keep it on topic and respectful.

The last post was at the beginning of April so this one is a bit premature, but I asked myself a question the other day and I wanted to go ahead and put it to others in the asexual and in particular aromantic community.

Do you understand romantic love? Regardless of whether or not you experience it, do you understand it? I have to confess I really don’t. I certain recognize and identify with many reasons for liking or even loving another person, but it often seems to me that a defining feature of romantic love is that it is unreasonable, and that’s the part I don’t get. Sometimes you can see this contrast starkly, like in those Savage Love letters where the writer describes all the ways their partner abuses and humiliates them and then concludes with “…but other than that he’s a great guy and I love him more than anything.” But it also gets me when I see somebody post on Facebook that their beloved is “the absolute prettiest/smartest/funniest girl in the world” and I can’t help but feel irritated because objectively that’s nearly certainly not true.

If that makes me sound like an emotionless robot, I’m not. I cry at movie trailers all the time. But crazy, stupid love is a mystery to me. Anybody else?