The Weekend Politics Thread Tries To Stay Up To Date

Welcome to the weekend! Since I’m travelling, I’ve written this WPT header a few days in advance. Think of it as a time capsule, a message from the long-forgotten days before… whatever bonkers stuff happens between Thursday and Saturday morning. Now, this particular mini-essay doesn’t have a structure or a theme or anything. Instead, I’ve just expressed some of my thoughts on recent news in the form of incoherent rage, transcribed below.

RAAAAAWAAAARHGHGJ AAAAAAUUUUGH EEEEEEEERRRRLKJHG WHAT

OK, enough of that. Here are some of the politics-related things that are happening out there in happen-space.

Trump: Grendel of the stock market

I assume by the time this post goes live, the stock market thingy will be up to some very high number, perhaps as high as, uh, let’s say 80. That’s a high number, right? I don’t know much about the “stock market” or the “economy” or having “money,” really, but everyone I know with a 401k is doing a lot of this lately.

People with “money” advise me that stability would be nice. Here’s my expert advice back to them about how to achieve that: don’t give Steve Mnuchin the ability to short the market, and don’t give Donald Trump the authority to fire the Fed chief.

Government shut down

Thanks to the cleverest genius negotiator-in-chief like EVER, the US government is in a partial shutdown. Current status:

Trump’s demand, before he releases his hostage, is a bunch of money for a border wall that lacks sufficient support to make it through Congress. Looks like the plan is to wait him out, and hope he gets bored. Meanwhile, we can express our frustration in Lego form – enjoy!

Concentration camps for kids

Migrant child dies in Border Patrol custody; second in a month

This is just awful, and I don’t know what to say about it. Except this: everyone responsible needs to be held criminally liable.

Hey, I’ve noticed a common theme in all three of those stories. I have a theme after all! The theme is Trump sucks. I guess not all themes can be especially original. Maybe I should try looking outside my America-centric, Trump-obsessed bubble for a change, and see what’s happening somewhere else, among the 95% of humanity that aren’t Americans. (Though actually, geographically speaking, all the people of North and South America are Americans – ooh, how about United Statesians! No? Too bulky? Nevermind.)

Turkey prepares to invade Kurdish territory

DAMMIT TRUMP

Please don’t threaten Mayor McSquirrel or anyone else. Commence commenting!