♪ Fifteen years later
Caught in time’s incinerator
Yesterday’s worries are today’s
But the good times are so near just sitting back and drinking beer
You know I’m halfway down the road.
But I know that I still ain’t there ♪
— “Can’t Go Back,” Soul Asylum
No, not that unholy offspring of a Ben Folds Five and Maroon 5 hate fuck after too many tequila shots, but four unjustly forgotten Minutemen musical meisterwerks plus one apt introductory track from the greatest post-punk power pop band not named Hüsker Dü that Minneapolis ever produced.1
This comment board fills daily with proof that everything in the world of politics and policy grows more pear-shape by the second. The distortion never stops, most likely because it never actually started.
From chapter 1, verse 9 of Ecclesiastes to Justin Timberlake’s FutureSexLoveSounds,2 reminders that the Sun never rises on a new phenomenon and that what goes around comes around never lie far from our consciousnesses. As exhibits 1, b, three, and delta, your bad-at-lists Weekend Politics Thread host presents a litany of lyrical timebombs from the band that that band you like likes.
♫ Organizing the Boy Scouts for murder is wrong
Ten years beyond the big sweat point
Man, it was still there ever without you
Coming back around, look!
Coming together, for just a second
A peek, a guess
At the wholeness it’s way too big
At the wholeness it’s way too big ♫
— “Political Song for Michael Jackson to Sing,” Minutemen3
Remember when Trump regaled a West Virginia meadow’s worth of 9- to 21-year-old from around the globe with ribald tales of boat sex and electoral fraud? Pepperidge Farm and Uvular remembers. That self-shameless youth rally leader has since upped his fascist harangue game to praising physical assaults on reporters even while standing on the precipice of the next War of Jenkin’s Ear over the Saudis’ assassination of a journalist.4
♬ The games they play, the lives they take
They bank their money in this country
They steal from the innocent
A colonial trait that’s much too old
The banks, the lives, the profits, the lies
The banks, the profits, the lives and the lies
I would call it genocide
Any other word would be a lie ♬
— “Untitled Song for Latin America,” Minutemen
“Banana Republic” means more than “a place at the mall where everyone used to buy cargo shorts.” U.S. Marines started in the 1910s installing and propping up puppet regimes headed by actual banana plantation owners in Panama and points north. We, in the U.S. nonroyal sense, created that latest caravan of Honduran, Salvadoran, and Guatemalan economic refugees fighting their way across the southern border of Mexico even as you slog through this too-long sentence. And if you think making it all the way to that period posed a challenge, imagine what the migrants have to overcome.
♪ Soft and understanding eyes of the young
Moving with abandon atop the green lawns
Malleable as luck allows faking all the ties ♪
— “The Roar of the Masses Could Be Farts,” Minutmen
At 10 o’clock, do parents know their children have slipped into bed whilst watching a never-ending stream of Prager University and Gavin McInnes YouTube videos just so they can spend the following school day posting dank memes on 4chan and Reddit to own the libs?
♫ A word war will set off the keg. My words are war
Should a word have two meanings? What the fuck for?
Should words serve the truth?
I stand for language. I speak for truth. I shout for history
I am a cesspool for all the shit to run down in … ♫
— “Do You Want New Wave or Do You Want the Truth?” Minutemen
Not for nothing, your logorrheic WPT host saved this header’s banner image to his laptop as “minute-ours.”5
Exactly when did the proto, actual and neo-Nazis acquire uncontested claim to America’s patriotic pageantry? Or, if sometimes questioned, at least largely granted claim?
Rev. Martin Luther King Jr. called the Declaration of Independence’s promise of life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness, as well as the 13th, 14th, and 15th Amendments’ guarantees of equal justice and unfettered access to the rights of citizenship, uncashed checks. Uvular probably would not accept a bank’s promissory note from the pictured unwashed, and probably smelly, Minutemen, but he would happily take cash from a huddled mass.
Everyone must take it as his and her duty to paint people of color, women, non-Christians and LGBT-plus folks into the moral mosaic of America. U.S.-based Politicados must further this project by voting against Republicans on or before Nov. 6, 2018, as the laws of their respective states allow.
Wait: Start by commenting here. Then vote.