Job Rants Thread – 8/31/2018

Hey, all; Happy Friday! Our menu is is going to be a…Different this week, as the manager in charge of the Happy Hour menu came down with a severe case of food poisoning earlier in the week,* and so, has tailored today’s menu to reflect that. But don’t worry! He’s assured us that it’s just as tasty as ever! (Or, at least, that’s what we could make out from the acoustics in the bathroom)

 

DRINKS:

Green Russian – A special blend of Kahlua, vodka, and Maalox. Lifts your spirits, settles your stomach! – $8.50

The Ipe-colada – A new take on a refreshing classic! Clean out your system, with a cool island breeze. (No more than one per customer) – $7.50

Tonic and Tonic – Even we acknowledge that, sometimes, it’s possible to have too much fun. For the times when you need to just settle things down for a bit; in your head, and your gut. – $6.50

 

APPS

The Variety Dish – A fun and colorful blend of everyone’s favorite acid blockers in a dish! Tums, Rolaids, Pepcid AC; there might even be some Mentos in there, we don’t know. Good for what ails you. – $8.00

Bananas – Nothing special about this one, folks; our manager just insisted we put it on here, as they apparently “saved his life,” yesterday. Comes in bunches. – $3.99

Also: Tonight only, unlimited unsalted crackers and white rice provided to all tables free of charge!**

 

Enjoy the long weekend, keep hydrated, and remember: it’s 5 o’clock, somewhere!

 

*NB: AVO Chintzee’s LLC absolves itself from any and all wrongdoing in this matter, as per the standard employment contract, Section IV, subsection 93-A

**Meal tax applies