So it’s official, we’re doing this. From now to whenever the oligarchs that control The Avocado deem us unprofitable, we will be giving you only the most weekliest trailers and teasers to come out this week, lead by your good buddy and professional panicker, Happiest.
Starting with television:
“We are not born equal. We must be made equal by the fire…and then we can be happy. Fahrenheit 451, starring Michael B. Jordan and Michael Shannon, premieres May 19 at 8pm on HBO.”
A few years stuck in development hell, the adaption of the critically loved Ray Bradbury book will finally premire on HBO of all places. Due to the network, I thought this was a tv series.
Fahrenheit 451 will premiere on HBO May 19, 8pm. Directed by Ramin Bahrani
Moving on to Film:
HOW TO TALK TO GIRLS AT PARTIES
“An alien touring the galaxy breaks away from her group and meets two young inhabitants of the most dangerous place in the universe: the London suburb of Croydon.”
Shout out to Wes Lawson for bringing this trailer to my attention! Produced by A24 and featuring Nicole Kidman as a punk rock alien, this film looks cool, weird, and incredibly divisive. I’m excited to check it out.
How To Talk To Girls will be released in theaters on May 18, 2018 in the states, and a week earlier in the UK.
AVENGERS INFINITY WAR
While this tv spot has a lot of footage that we’ve seen before, it also gives more focus on Wakanda, hopefully confirming from past trailers that T’Challa and the rest of the Black Panther cast will play an important role in Infinity War.
Infinity War will premiere in Theaters april 27, with a special early bird showing in LA on April 23. Directed by the Russo Brothers.
The first solo trailer dropped just a few days ago, and I assume most of the comments are going to be based on it, so I’ll keep my own commentary light. All I’ll say is that it has a troubling lack of porgs, and leave it at that.
Solo: A Star Wars Story will be in theaters May 25. Directed by Phil Lord and Chris- I mean, Ron Howard.
THE FIRST PURGE
“Behind every tradition lies a revolution. Next Independence Day, witness the rise of our country’s 12 hours of annual lawlessness. Welcome to the movement that began as a simple experiment: The First Purge.
To push the crime rate below one percent for the rest of the year, the New Founding Fathers of America (NFFA) test a sociological theory that vents aggression for one night in one isolated community. But when the violence of oppressors meets the rage of the marginalized, the contagion will explode from the trial-city borders and spread across the nation.”
The Purge series has always been a guilty pleasure for me. It takes what could have been a lackluster premise and made it blatantly about the upperclass using officiated murder to oppress the underprivileged (Watch Purge Anarachy if you don’t believe me). Judging by the trailer, The First Purge seems to be be as blatant about this theme as the series has ever been, which I’m excited about.
The First Purge will be coming to theaters July 4(Get it?) Directed by Gerard Mcmurry
“After escaping an attack by what he claims was by a 70-foot shark, Jonas Taylor (Jason Statham) must confront his fears to save those trapped in a sunken submersible.”
When you boil it all down, we as moviegoers are simple people, usually attracted to basic concepts that engage and excite our most primal urges. Jason Statham fighting a giant shark is one of those. It’s an idea that’s so simple it seems impossible to mess up. The jury’s still out on whether this will deliver, but the scene with the shark chormping on some terrified swimmers looks amazing at least.
The Meg will be coming to theaters August 10, directed by Jon Turtletaub
Saw any cool trailers that I missed? Have opinions on these flicks? Annoyed as much as I am that the Megs size seems to change from shot to shot? Comment below!