Alien Vs. Predator opened on this day 20 years ago. The clash of the two mega-monsters had been anticipated for ages, so some fans were more than a bit vocal when it was reported it wouldn’t have an R rating. That’s right, unlike the other blood-soaked entries in both franchises, AVP was rated PG-13 for “violence, language, horror images, slime and gore.” Personally, that wasn’t a dealbreaker for me, since…wait, I’m sorry? SLIME? Did the MPAA seriously watch the movie and go “yes, the slime content of this really does merit such a rating”?

Anyway, the film tells the story of an arctic expedition to an underground pyramid, where…no, I can’t let this go. They ACTUALLY mentioned “slime” as a reason for the PG-13?!? Were they concerned over parents who didn’t want their kids exposed to such things? “Yes, mom and dad might be fine with all of the violence and gore, but the SLIME? That might be too much!”

Okay, okay. I’m done. Alien Vs. Predator was a pretty decent hit, earning NOW WAIT WHAT DOES THE MPAA THINK OF THE NICKELODEON KID’S CHOICE AWARDS?!? You know what those are FILLED with? SLIME! LOTS OF IT!! Would they give them a fucking TV-MA if they had the power?!?

Alright. Fine. I’m really finished. In 2007, the fans “got what they wanted” with an R-rated “sequel” called I AM SORRY I AM TRULY SORRY BUT DOESN’T OSCAR THE GROUCH HAVE A PET WORM NAMED “SLIMEY”???! DOES THAT MEAN PARENTS SHOULD BE “STRONGLY CAUTIONED” OVER SESAME STREET?!?!

Have a slimey day, y’all!