“Greetings, earth germs! It came to my attention that you pathetic flesh creatures celebrated something called ‘PRIME DAY’ today! And you’re doing it AGAIN tomorrow! Well, two can play at this holiday game! Effective immediately, tonight is MEGATRON TARGET NIGHT! That’s right! All prices (on select items only, and probably not on anything you were actually going to buy) are CUT IN HALF at Target in my honor! That’s right. Just like I did to Autobot Jazz in the Michael Bay movie. Good times!
Have a WORTHLESS night, you parasites!”