Jerry pretends his girlfriend is his wife so that she can claim a discount at the dry cleaner, and it ruins their relationship. Elaine tries to figure out how her male friend feels about her, a situation complicated by him seeing George pee in the shower at the gym. Kramer struggles to sleep as he dates his new girlfriend.
Written by: Peter Mehlman
Directed by: Tom Cherones
What is a Seinfeldian plot? I ask because there’s something about ‘pretending to be married to get a discount, only for things to spiral out of control’ that feels particularly on-brand for this series, like it’s an absurd expression of the show’s basic ethos. We’re starting with a minor breach of etiquette, in which something could feasibly be done, it just feels wrong, like bending the rules of gravity. Jerry’s girlfriend takes advantage of a minor act of generosity in a way where it feels like the universe should punish both of them for it. And the consequences for this also feel part of the Seinfeld ethos, in that they come from a slightly different angle than you’d expect – Jerry getting yelled at by his family for not telling them he’d gotten married, and in a way where he can’t easily correct them.
In fact, the dry cleaner – the ostensible victim of the whole thing – never realises what’s happened!
There’s something here in how the plot is driven by people feeling slighted, rather than Jerry being punished by the dry cleaner. Leo’s enraged because he believes his nephew has insulted him by not inviting him to his wedding, not even telling him about it. It’s funny that you automatically understand his confusion and annoyance. And Leo is outside the initial problem entirely; Jerry’s calculation has blown up in his face because he’s forgotten about the entire civilisation outside of it.
It’s also hilarious to me that the relationship was destroyed, not by any outside force, but by the sheer weight of the fake marriage itself (a comedic variation on the third season of The Shield). Jerry being ‘married’ is inherently a funny concept in the same way two adults acting like divorcing parents of their third adult friend is inherently funny, or robots acting like people is inherently funny; Jerry acting with any kind of actual responsibility is so strange as to be comedic. And we end with another acknowledgement of Seinfeld (comedian) being a competent actor, when his visible confusion through the whole breakup is so fucking funny.
TOPICS O’ THE WEEK
- Yes, yes, this is a rare Seinfeld/Friends linkup, with Courtney Cox playing Meryl. I do enjoy the unnecessary warmth she brings to the role, and I especially enjoy her ‘slovenly dumb husband’ scene.
- “My wife this, my wife that. It’s an amazing way to begin a sentence!” / “My wife has an inner ear infection.”
- George peeing in the shower is the most iconic part of the episode, so it’s especially funny to me how little actual plot it takes up. He’s mostly wandering around the edges of everyone else.
- Elaine reading her friend’s signals is a fun plot. Julia Louis-Dreyfuss has a very Michael Richards moment where she snaps her leotard and then reacts to it. Also has a brilliant tiny scoff when she talks like she got Greg over a barrel.
- “IT’S ALL PIPES, WHAT’S THE DIFFERENCE?!” / “Different pipes go to different places!”
- As soon as Kramer brings up the tanning place, you can hear the audience reacting, knowing exactly where that’s going.
- “I don’t see a white boy! I see a damn fool!”
Biggest Laugh:
Next Week: “The Raincoats”, Parts I & II. I’ll do both of them together.