Towards the end of the Age of Strife, the Emperor crafted 20 magical clone babies that he called Primarchs. The forces of Chaos didn’t like the Emperor very much, so they kidnapped his magical clone babies and threw them randomly all over the galaxy, and the Emperor had all kinds of adventures finding them again. This thread is about the fifth magical clone baby the Emperor recovered – Fulgrim, called the Phoenecian, Primarch of the 3rd Legion.
Li’l Fulgrim landed on a planet named Chemos, which was a mining world that was rapidly running out of things to mine, and had been cut off from the rest of the galaxy by terrible space storms for centuries. Fulgrim, being a magical clone baby, was immediately smarter, stronger, and prettier than everyone in the world and they made him their CEO. As CEO, he spearheaded initiatives to reinvigorate industry and commerce on the dying world, and began creating, from whole cloth, a new culture of beauty and elegance, which is how he got his epithet, The Phoenecian.
Unlike most of his brothers, when the Emperor landed on Chemos, Fulgrim took one look at the swaggering slab of beefcake that was his Dad and swore eternal fealty to him. His brother, Ferrus Manus, looked around Fulgrim’s palace and said, “Art and culture are stupid”. Fulgrim, smiling tightly, thanked Ferrus for his input, and forever after called Ferrus “The Gorgon,” for being the antithesis of what Fulgrim believed in.
Years later, while Horus was being infested with Chaos at the Evil Chaos Den of Evil Chaos Healing, Fulgrim would find a beautifully crafted magical sword that happened to have a Chaos Daemon in it. Clever bastard that it was it bided its time. Eventually, when Fulgrim found out that Horus had been infested with Chaos, he happened to tell his brother, Ferrus Manus, that he thought Horus was making some good points and maybe we should hear him out. Ferrus absolutely lost his shit and tried to hammer Fulgrim to death. Fulgrim was a much, much better duelist than Ferrus ever was and just bodied his brother. Thinking he had killed one of his fellow Magical Clone Babies, Fulgrim got very, very sad.
This was the opportunity the magical sword had been waiting for! It whispered into his mind, “hey, buddy, heyyyyy. I can make you not sad anymore. You don’t like being sad, right buddy?” and Fulgrim said, “No, I hate being sad. Please make it stop.” and then the daemon in the sword burned out his soul and took over. This is what Fulgrim looks like now:
Don’t be like Fulgrim. Don’t almost accidently kill your siblings, no matter how much they annoy you; follow the site rules; and above all, be kind to one another.