Third and final in a series (Parts 1 and 2). Ranking things is fun! What are some things that you like to rank by how much they are about something?
Criteria: Pretty self-explanatory, honestly.
- I Can Never Go Home Anymore (Shangri-Las-65!, 1965)
- What Parents Just Don’t Understand: That we’re in love.
- Body Count of Parents Not Understanding: 0
- Reference: “Now my mom is a good mom/And she loves me with all her heart/But she said I was too young to be in love/And the boy and I would have to part”
- Ranking: This one is an odd fit. The heroine does run away from home due to a standard-issue parents-just-not-understanding situation (come on, Mom, they’re in love). But in this case, in a twist, the abandoned parent dies tragically instead of the heartbroken teen. This is not how the guilt trip is supposed to work, Mom! It’s backwards! Technically qualifies for this list but ranked lowest due to subversion of trope.
- It’s Easier to Cry (Leader of the Pack, 1965)
- What Parents Just Don’t Understand: That we’re in love.
- Body Count of Parents Not Understanding: 0
- Reference: “They said forget about him,/You’re better off without him,/Go out and find yourself another guy/But I love him so, I can’t forget him/No, No, Its easier to cry”
- Ranking: Look, are we sad that our parents just don’t understand? Sure. We’re crying after all. But it’s not like our parents didn’t not understand so hard that somebody died from it. So, comparatively speaking, things aren’t so bad. Also, it’s unclear from context whether the break-up was parent-initiated or spontaneous. All in all, makes sense this is down at 4.
- Dressed In Black (1963?)
- What Parents Just Don’t Understand: That we’re in love.
- Body Count of Parents Not Understanding: 0-1
- Reference: “They said he was much too wild for me/They said I didn’t know what I was getting myself into/They said a whole lot of things/But there are some things they could never understand”
- Ranking: Clearly, our parents just didn’t understand. Clearly, this made the poor boy sad (“Dressed in black/He walks alone, a shadow in the night” etc. etc.) But is he dead? That’s the question here. The song ends with “But now he’s gone/But now he’s gone” which, like, how gone is he? Did he move to Connecticut? Did he join the navy? Or is he, you know, gone gone? We need specifics.
- Leader of the Pack (Leader of the Pack, 1965)
- What Parents Just Don’t Understand: That we’re in love.
- Body Count of Parents Not Understanding: 1
- Reference: “My folks were always putting him down (Down, down)/They said he came from the wrong side of town”
- Ranking: Here are some specifics. And how! Not only does someone clearly die of parental non-understanding, we get a dramatic re-enactment of said tragic death mid-song, with sound effects. We know exactly what happened here. Do not let your heartbroken boyfriend get on a motorcycle, ladies!
- Give Us Your Blessings (Shangri-Las-65!, 1965)
- What Parents Just Don’t Understand: That we’re in love.
- Body Count of Parents Not Understanding: 2
- Reference: Reference: “They went to their folks they told them/That someday soon they’d be wed/Their folks just laughed and called them kids/So Mary said/“Give us your blessings/Please don’t make us run away/Give us your blessings/Say you’ll be there on our wedding day”
- Ranking: Well, this is it folks. If you don’t let your teenage children get married, they will die in a car crash. It’s just science. And won’t you be sorry then. In sum, A+, no notes, would present a guilt-trip in the form of spoken word art again.
As we all know, I love a live version, but unfortunately after extensive research (=first page of Duckduckgo results) I couldn’t find one for “Give Us Your Blessings,” so here is the studio track. If you’d like, here is a live1 TV version of #2, “Leader of the Pack,” complete with onstage motorcycle man, who appears to be Robert Goulet? Anyhoo, it’s great.
- mildly lip synched
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Happy Day Threading!